Troubled Minds
by MySilentLullaby
Summary: Chell is leading a  somewhat  normal life when an old friend returns and Chell's life is flipped. Now Chell must choose between her mind and her heart in order to prevent the world and the people around her from being destroyed...
1. Waiting

Troubled Minds

**Chapter One: Waiting**

Each morning was the same, but she really didn't mind. At least she was free from... That place. She enjoyed her freedom to the fullest.

Every morning her alarm clock would buzz at the same time; seven am. Each morning, she'd slowly open her eyes, using her lightly tanned arm to shield her eyes from the sunlight peeking through her window, a smile playing upon her lips as she realized she wasn't being awoken by the harsh glare of fluorescent lighting and an automated voice yelling at her to get up and do the exercises assigned to every test subject in long-term relaxation.

This morning, her alarm clock was late. When she finally opened her beautiful blue-grey eyes, it was nearly ten am. Struggling to stand up, the young woman used all her strength to roll off the un-sheeted mattress she had on the floor and onto her hands and knees. Her muscles straining and aching as she raised herself up onto her bare feet.

Since earning her freedom from Aperture Science, she hadn't been able to earn enough money to live as lavishly as she hoped. The world had become very corrupted, and finding a job was hard, mostly because there weren't very many jobs left.

The world had fallen into a state of pure anarchy. Although it seemed rather impossible, an infection had spread, causing a pandemic. The undead had risen, and although most deteriorated, many still remained limbering across the countryside like a scene in a George A. Romero film. Even if an area was zombie free, no area was 100% safe.

The woman waltzed into the tiny bathroom of the apartment, turning the shower on and stepping into the cold water. She almost immediately regretted it, cursing the armored apartment complex for not fixing their hot water system. She kept her guard up as the suds of soap washed over her body; just one of the many skills she had managed not to forget from her testing days at Aperture.

Stepping out of the shower and quickly drying off her already chilly skin, she poked her head out of the door and glanced at the time, gasping as she realized how late she already was.

She dropped the towel to the floor and rushed over to the basket of clothing she had near her makeshift bed. Most of the clothing was old military uniforms and donated clothing, as well as her old testing jumpsuit... She paused, her eyes focusing on the orange suit for a moment before lifting up a baggy old military uniform.

Dressing quickly, she finally made her way down to the lobby of the building. Nodding quick _hellos_ to other patrons as she passed by, the woman shot passed the long forgotten mailboxes and towards the front door.

"Mornin' Chell! You speaking today?" The doorman teased. He stood up straight, a rifle in his hands.

She smiled softly, her eyes gleaming in the morning sunlight as she playfully shook her head: No. She hadn't spoken in a very, very long time and she definitely wasn't about to now. The doorman asked her everyday if she'd ever start talking again and every day she'd reply with a quick shake of her head. Chell enjoyed their little flirtatious conversations, smiling each time he asked.

Chell lived in a large armored complex, with two large apartment buildings, a set of townhouses, and a Walmart. The entire area was secured with a large steel wall. Chell had found it after escaping Aperture and had lived there ever since. Although there weren't many jobs, Chell had landed a position as a look-out on one of the walls. There was no pay; just a guaranteed apartment and 3 rations of food per day.

The job was simple; sit at the lookout and watch for any survivors, zombies, anything at all. Chell's lookout spot overshadowed a grassy field that had gone dry from lack of rain. In the far distance, a tiny aluminum shack stood alone. Chell would watch the shack through her binoculars each day unwearingly. It was almost as if she was waiting for something...

Chell walked at her own pace to her post, she knew the other young woman who she worked with wouldn't mind her tardiness. When she did arrive at the lookout, the 30-something year old, army-clad partner (named Michelle) smiled and waved, "You're late Chell, don't worry about it though, nothing interesting ever happens on this side anyways!"

Chell nodded and took her seat next to her. Chell looked down at her long fall boots; she had refused to wear anything but them since she landed the job. Then she saw her binoculars lying nearby, waiting for her. Chell ran her fingers along the textured barrels of the binoculars and picked them up. She smiled, ready to begin the day.

"Where's your giant cube you always carry around with you?" Michelle asked, she was already staring through her own pair of binoculars.

Chell frowned, glaring at her blonde-haired friend.

Michelle tapped a small pad of paper. She had brought it when Chell started working with her and she realized the dark-haired woman refused to speak at all. Michelle had been a therapist before the apocalypse and loved to listen - or in this case, read - what people were thinking and feeling.

Chell liked to write down what she couldn't convey through speech. Using the chunk of pencil they had taken from the Walmart, Chell scribbled, "We had another fight. The Weighted Companion Cube thinks we are all in danger if we stay here..." onto the paper.

Michelle's dark eyes scanned the paper quickly before returning to her position looking out into the golden grass. "Why don't you believe the cube, Chell?"

Chell wrote, "I do believe it. I just don't want to."

Michelle gave the brunette a quick reassuring glance before asking a question she'd asked many times before, "Why do you watch that shack? It's not like anything is gonna happen. You said you were the only living thing to ever come from that shack."

Chell nodded and scribbled across the page, "I'm waiting..."

"For?" Michelle continued.

"An old friend..."

Michelle stared at the young, mute, woman. Chell had obviously been traumatized by whatever the shack led to, and her traumatizing past had had lead her to have a slight case of schizophrenia. But Chell's undying determination and positive attitude surprised Michelle.

She sighed, patting Chell on the back. "Don't worry Chell, any day now... any day..."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Hey everyone! It's been a while since I last posted something!  
>It's finally here! My Portal fic! I want to thank VampireLady666 on Tumblr for helping me edit these first few chapters! Where would I be without her?<p>

This is rated T right now, but that is subject to change depending on where the story goes from here...

Portal and its characters are copyright Valve


	2. Slice of Heaven

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Two: Slice of Heaven**

The moon had started to rise, Chell and Michelle's shift was almost over. Soon two more army-clad people would take over, leaving Chell to worry about her little shack in the distance.

When Chell had first arrived at the compound and got the position at the lookout, she didn't want to leave the post; she practically had to be torn away from her spot on the great wall. After constant reassurances that she'd be the first to know if anything happened, Chell was willing to leave the post on her own free will.

Michelle's back was against the wall, she was half-asleep and her combat boots had been kicked off and thrown off to the side. Her bare feet wiggled every now and then in the cool evening air. Chell smiled as Michelle's toes curled slightly as a gust of wind blew past them.

Chell had always wondered why they were given military uniforms. It seemed strange; there had been no sign of the military in years, but she had never thought to ask. There was a rumor going around at one point that the uniforms had come from a special military unit that had caused the zombie outbreak. But those rumors were put to rest when one of the more elderly patrons spoke about how the military had lost so many soldiers that they were donating the uniforms to cities like theirs as extra clothing for survivors. Of course, this was only a rumor as well, and Chell wasn't sure if she should believe either story.

Chell took a quick glance at the now sleeping Michelle, taking a deep breath in and turning back to her binoculars. "I'll just let her sleep. She deserves it,"Chell thought, her smile fading slightly.

Sitting cross-legged, Chell stared straight at her little shack, watching it like a hawk watched it's prey. The shack was tiny and barely visible to the naked eye, but when using her binoculars, Chell could see every tiny detail. From the minuscule Aperture Science logo above the shabby, rusted door, to the inexplicable dents and burn marks all over it.

The sky was getting darker, and she watched as the horizon went from bright blue to a whimsical shade of pink. Chell enjoyed nights like these. She loved the sound of the crickets chirping in the long grass and the sound of Michelle snoring softly. Every night was like this and Chell couldn't wait to sit out and watch the sky change colours. She felt like she watching a painting being made especially for her; her own little slice of heaven.

The dark-haired mute sat admiring the sky when suddenly she noticed movement near her shack. She immediately focused her binoculars on the shack, thinking it was only an animal or the rare zombie that had found its way into the fields. After a few moments of watching it though, Chell noticed a large cube-like figure peeking up from the long, dry grass; bobbing up and down as if it was floating in a very large sea of gold.

Upon further investigation, Chell could see a tiny, glowing, pink heart on each side of the cube figure. She took the binoculars away from her face as she realized what was going on. Her jaw dropped and her eyes became wide.

"A Companion Cube?" She mouthed, staring at it in awe. She reached over a poked Michelle in the ribs.

Michelle awoke with an audible gasp and immediately looked through her binoculars out into the field. "wha... CHELL! IT'S YOUR CUBE! Someone's stealing it!"

Chell shook her head no and scribbled furiously on the pad of paper: "It's him..."

Michelle gave her friend a concerned, but thoughtful look before saying, "Go. I'll look after everything here... Just go!"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Sorry for such a short chapter... Things are starting to get interesting!  
>Thanks again to VampireLady666 on tumblr for helping me edit this! Hopefully the next few chapters aren't as short! xD<p>

Characters (C) Valve

Michelle (C) Me


	3. The Field of Forever

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Three: The Field of Forever**

Chell's breath was heavy as her Long Fall Boots pounded against the earth. Her heart pounded heavily in her chest with each leap she took. The tall grass rustled about her as she pushed on, every muscle in her body being stretched to its extreme.

Michelle had watched as the ex-test subject leaped off the fifty story tall wall, landing gently on her feet, like a cat, without a single scratch. Chell had giggled silently at the expression on the blonde's face as she began the long run towards the shack.

As Chell ran, she felt the need to call out to him, she wanted to speak to him. She opened her mouth, ready to shout the first thing to come to mind, but fear overtook her. She hadn't spoken in so long, what if she couldn't speak at all anymore? What if, when she tried, nothing but hoarse gargles and screeches came out?

But, being the determined individual she was, Chell was set on getting his attention somehow. She opened and closed her mouth a couple of times, but no matter how hard she tried, her heavy breathing and lack of anything to say stopped her. She didn't even know his real name...

Suddenly a melody began to fill her mind as she continued her long trek through the grasses. The memory of sitting in one of his little dens, the radio blaring out the song over and over as she slowly drifted into a peaceful sleep only made her want to get to him faster. Each little clue or gift he'd left for her in those cold, brightly lit test chambers had made her feel like she actually knew him; like he was her friend.

After what seemed like an hour of running, Chell noticed she was getting closer. She could see a man's figure ahead; hunched over with the companion cube attached to his back via a strange home made mechanism.

Chell settled in the grass, crouching so as to spy on him, waiting to make her move. She parted the grass slightly so she would have a clear view of her prey...

The man looked around frantically and began shouting incoherently. He then threw his arms into the air and called out, "Who's there? Show yourself!" His voice was rough and sounded shaken.

Chell parted the last of the grass that separated them and stood tall. Staring at him, she took in every little detail; he was incredibly tall, though you wouldn't know it by the way he was bent over, back hunched to support the weight of the cube, and he was extremely thin; like he hadn't eaten in years. His dark, matted hair stood up in all different angles and he had a greying, scruffy beard. He was shaking violently and the lab coat he wore was torn and bloody. The blood seemed to have originated from a large wound on his leg; a turret's doing, no doubt.

But the most intriguing physical feature were his eyes. They were wide and surrounded by large, dark bags that made him look much older than he really was, and like he hadn't sleep in over a decade. His eyes were an iridescent shade of blue and one pupil seemed larger than the other. Chell was taken aback by their beauty.

They stood silently staring at each other for a good while, the moon shining from above them. Finally it seemed to kick in and his eyes widened as he realized who exactly she was. "It... it's you... The angel! Our savior! Chell!" He cried.

The fact that he was standing there, still alive, made her want to cry. She'd waited so long to meet him and here he was. Chell ran at the sound of her name, wrapping her arms around his neck as she threw herself into him. He was shocked, but nervously wrapped his arms around the younger woman's petite waist. "She's survived... She's... real."

Chell buried her face into his scruffy neck, tears streaming through her eyes. The emotions she felt were mixed; she was terrified and overjoyed and sad all at once. She wanted to say something, anything, just to let him know she was real, that she would always be real. But all she could think about was the lovely song that kept playing over and over in the back of her mind.

Finally, determined to speak, she opened her mouth and whispered into his ear, "Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?"

It was the first she'd spoken in years and the sound of her voice, soft and small, surprised them both. She looked up into his eyes and almost felt like gasping. Chell was horrified with her voice and there was nothing she could do about it. She quickly turned away from him and began walking back towards the complex in the distance, waving her arms in the air to signal the rescue team.

"Come," She spoke up, "Bring your Companion Cube..."

~x~

Chell placed a plain, white mug filled with murky, weak, lukewarm coffee in front of the man. His eyes, which had been watching her intensely for the last two hours, tore away from her to look down at the brown liquid. A soft, nearly impossible to catch smile appeared on his face as he brought the mug to his lips.

"Coffee... I haven't had coffee since... since the activation," The man mumbled. It seemed he hadn't been talking to Chell, but rather was speaking to his cube, which sat on the floor beside his chair. He patted it gently with his hand.

Chell set her own mug down and sat across from him at her kitchen table. She watched as he stared amorously at his cube, the moonlight reflecting softly off his greasy, matted black hair. She took a sip of her coffee and watched him scratch at his bandage the medics had fixed his leg with. He began shivering, his thin clothing was not good for the cold weather of the coming winter.

She stood up quickly and his eyes widened at the sudden movement. "You're cold!" She stated, still frightened by the sound of her voice. "I'll get you a blanket."

She started towards the bedroom door but his cold, clammy hands caught her before she could go any farther. "I came to the surface for a reason, Chell."

His voice, grave and hoarse, had a very distinct seriousness to it. It was almost ominous. Chell was terrified for a moment as the man stared intensely into her eyes. She had never seen such intensity in her life, her heart beat faster as the adrenaline rushed through her veins.

"I... I know," She whispered, defeated. Quietly, she sat back down and rested her free hand on top of the hand he was using to pin her to the table. "I fought about it with my cube..."

"Then you know. What's going on down in Aperture, I mean." He wasn't rambling on or twitching as much now. It was almost as if he was completely sane again. His eyes were as intense as ever.

Chell shook her head, "No... Tell me..."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Again, thanks to my editor VampireLady666 on Tumblr. Without her I have no faith in my writing skills.

Thank you all for reading and getting interested! It means so much to me! Really! I'll try to update much faster now that I'm done with my lectures for this week. c:

Please keep reading and don't be afraid to review! Tell me what you think! I'd love to hear your questions and suggestions!

Portal characters (C) Valve


	4. Flashbacks

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Four: Flashbacks**

Doug Rattmann sighed as he looked down into his coffee cup, the pool of dark brown liquid rippled slightly as the voices in his head fought over the obvious decision of whether to speak to the beautiful woman sitting across from him or not. The yellowing walls of Chell's apartment only added to the lightly tanned glow her skin gave off as she stared curiously at him. Doug glanced down at his hands cupped protectively around the coffee mug, the dim lighting of her kitchenette made his skin look pasty and grey, he mentally noted he'd never look as radiant as she did. He was much too old and crazy.

Doug noted the silence that had developed between them, but ignored it as he began to lose himself in his thoughts. Chell didn't seem to mind, she was used to silence. Rattmann took another sip and began his story...

~x~

Doug was one of the top scientists in his department and he hated his job. He had used to enjoy it, before the CEO of Aperture Science, Cave Johnson, went mad and forced everyone to work on his one dying wish. Doug did not feel right about the project, not that it was of any his concern. Many of the other scientists had their doubts about it as well.

It wasn't until after Mr. Johnson's death that Doug's weird feelings about the project increased. Caroline, Mr. Johnson's enthusiastic assistant, had taken over the company, and although she did well in keeping up with the CEO's dying wishes, there was one thing she just couldn't do.

Cave's last dying wish was to have his mind digitally backed up and uploaded into an artificial intelligence, and if he had died before the technology wasn't developed by the time he died, he wanted Caroline to take his place.

Doug hated his job.

One morning, after an all-nighter in his office, working on some overdue paperwork, Doug heard bloodcurdling screams of protest and fear as Caroline was dragged down the hallway to her inevitable doom. That morning, Doug watched as the life drained from the woman's eyes.

Doug hated his job. He would never get away from it.

At first, the other scientists in Doug's department thought of it as a success! A triumph! They had literally pushed the world's knowledge of science into the future, and had played God. But the celebration ended quickly when they discovered the Genetic Life form and Disk Operating System was quite unstable.

Doug had been talking to his co-worker Henry, an average man with brown, balding hair and a grin that could cheer anyone up. They had been chatting about the upcoming Bring Your Daughter To Work Day. Doug had no children, nor was he married, his mental illnesses had stopped him from getting too social with anyone, but Henry on the other hand, had a little girl he and his blonde-haired wife, had adopted a few years back. Henry went on about how he was so excited to bring her in and let her see what daddy did. Doug felt an overwhelming sense of dread as Henry went on and on about his little "dark-haired sweetie" and how she'd want to follow in her daddy's footsteps after she visited. But Doug just shook his head slowly and kept quiet.

Bring Your Daughter to Work Day turned out to be a disaster. Some idiots in Doug's department had decided to start up the GLaDOS system early and the AI went nuts; filling the first few floors with deadly neurotoxin and practically killing a good amount of employees, and their daughters. The scientists had stopped GLaDOS before she could go any farther though; shutting her down and beginning work on a new project they called: The Personality Spheres Initiative.

Daughters who had survived were immediately put into stasis, and later forgotten about when Aperture employees decided to sacrifice themselves for the sphere project. Eventually though, the daughters were woken in order to be trained and possibly recruited for human testing.

The second largest incident GLaDOS had caused happened long after the sphere project had been abandoned and Henry, who had put all his trust into GLaDOS, had activated her out of the belief the personality cores would work. But Doug knew better. That day, Doug was the only survivor.

Doug looked frantically through the test subject files, noting most were either dead or would be too heavily brain damaged to know what they were doing. He had glanced down at his Companion Cube, patting it gently before changing the testing order...

~x~

Doug looked up at Chell. His cube let out a soft growl of jealously. Doug smirked inwardly at the jealous display before finishing his story. He twitched involuntarily as he downed the last of his coffee. The silence was beautiful.

_Stop gawking at her and get to the point, Doug! We don't have time for you to be drooling over some woman you just met,_ The cube announced. Doug jumped, and ran a shaky hand through his thick and already messy hair.

Chell sat in blissful silence, seemingly unaware of what the cube had just said. _She can't hear me you idiot. She's got her own cube._

Doug nodded and rubbed the back of his neck, managing to spit out, "Aperture is in danger. Everyone in a 50 mile radius is in danger."

Chell, reverting to her old ways, stayed silent and opted to tilt her head questioningly at him. She raised one eyebrow at him and gave him the look his coworkers used to give him. It was look that said "You're crazy."

Doug shook his head and buried his face into the palms of his hands. "She's malfunctioning! She'll blow up if she doesn't test a human soon."

Chell immediately understood. Her face drained of all colour and her eyes widened in terror.

Doug looked up and stared into the pools of blueish-grey that were her eyes. "You're cube warned you of danger... The cube never lies, it is your friend. The cube was right. GLaDOS is on the verge of nuclear explosion..."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Hey! Sorry for such the long wait! I'm getting a lot of really nice reviews! Thanks a bunch for those! By the way, I always reply to questions via PM. I might end up doing an FAQ in one of the later chapters, but for now this works. Also, if you haven't yet done so, please visit my editor's tumblr VampireLady666(dot)Tumblr(dot)com and tell her thanks for all the support and love she's given me throughout this process! She lives in a different time zone than I do so we end up talking at strange hours about everything and anything. But that's not the point!

Oh I also want to warn you all, Chapter 5 is literally the shortest chapter in the entire story so far. It's only one page typed. I'm hoping to have it uploaded by tonight as well.


	5. Restlessness

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Five: Restlessness**

Chell was lying on her mattress on the floor of her bedroom, staring blankly up at the ceiling. She had one arm lying languidly over her forehead as the other hand nervously fiddled with the blankets under her. Her eyes shifted over to the digital clock sitting on the floor next to her makeshift bed; 3:55 AM. She let out a tired, exasperated breath.

Chell's face twisted into an expression of doubt and worry. She'd spent the last few hours thinking about what the rat-like man had said rather than getting any sleep. If what he had said was true, the whole compound would be in danger. She repeated his words over and over in her head until they didn't even make sense anymore.

Rolling onto her side, she faced her Companion Cube; a large cube structure adorned in hearts and other geometric shapes. She blinked a few times before hearing it's voice cut through the dark like a knife through butter. _I told you so._

_ "I still don't know whether to believe him or not..." _Chell thought in response to her cube.

_You're a fool then. But most people are. It's easy to ignore your conscious, isn't it?_ The cube sat still in the dark, the only light in the room coming from it's glowing pink hearts.

The cube's words stung and Chell paused. Instead of replying, she ran her fingers along its grooves and embellishments, a sad smile crossing her lips.

"I... I just don't know if I can trust him," Chell remarked finally.

The cube scoffed, _you don't _trust_ him? You pretty much jumped into his arms the moment you saw him! He could have hurt you right then and there in the fields, but he didn't. He trusts you. He worships you..._

Chell went silent. There was nothing she could do or say that would continue the conversation well. She rolled onto her other side, back facing the cube as she stared out into her living room through the door she had left ajar. She caught a glimpse of the shaggy haired man sighing deeply in his sleep, his own Companion Cube wrapped lovingly in his arms.

He was so familiar, but she barely knew anything about him at all...

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Like I said, this chapter is short. c: Enjoy this double dose!


	6. His Deity

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Six: His Deity**

Chell awoke to the sound of her cube humming a very familiar tune; the song she'd heard in the rat den she had stuck in her head since Rattmann had arrived.

Chell couldn't even remember falling asleep. She rolled onto the cold hardwood flooring and shivered, reaching for her blankets. After a few minutes, Chell scrambled to her feet and headed into the living room to wake the man up and ask what he'd want for breakfast.

Upon entering the living room though, panic set in as Chell found he was no where to be seen. Not a single trace was left behind, not even the man's Cube... Chell began to panic and frantically searched the entire apartment, including the balcony she rarely used, only to fail in finding anything. It was like he had never existed.

Chell spun around, kicking her bedroom door open and growling at her cube under her breath, "What happened? Where is he?"

_Obviously, he's not here._

"Don't get smart with me!"

_He left._

"Why?"

_He knows you don't want to go back. He doesn't want to put you through the pain and suffering again._

Chell went quiet. The cube was right, it was always right. She sat down on the edge of the mattress and buried her face in her hands. As much as she wanted to help, her mind was too conflicted for her to make a choice.

_He'll be back, you know._

Chell didn't reply.

_You're a goddess in his eyes. Every religion has a deity, Chell, Rattmann's is you._

Chell glared, annoyed at the cube. She didn't like the idea of being a religious figure behind some paranoid, crazed, ex-scientist's theoretical faith. She felt sick just thinking about it.

_Religion can become an addiction. Rattmann certainly has an addiction to you, but he projects his undying love and faith in you onto his cube; using it for guidance, a source of love. He projects what his ideal you would be onto his cube, masking it as a different entity all together to avoid facing the truth. He's created an ideal person he's fallen in love with and, inevitably, has become addicted to it. In a sense, he's created you._

Chell couldn't hear another word of this bullshit. She stood up, covering her ears as she strode into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. Chell bent over and retched violently into the toilet.

Heaving and retching, Chell could hear the cube in the other room, softly humming the haunting song from his little dens...

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Hey hey hey! Here it is! Most of my chapters are pretty short as of late, but I promise the later chapters will be a little more lengthy! Anyways, a quick thanks to my editor again! and Hope you all enjoy this strange chapter! Thanks for all the wonderful comments and questions! Keep em' coming!


	7. The Return

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Seven: The Return**

Michelle's eyes stayed fixed on the younger dark-haired woman, a look of concern plaguing her face. She had watched Chell like a hawk any time she could since the arrival of the man who had claimed to be called "Drattmann" (Michelle hardly understood anything else he had rambled on about). Michelle frowned as Chell sighed again. She had been acting oddly since the man's disappearance two days ago.

"Chell, you shouldn't beat yourself up about this. He probably wasn't used to this place," Michelle tried, while patting the woman's back. Chell shrugged her away and shuffled away. "Look, He survived in Aperture longer than you did, I'm sure he knows how to survive, wherever he is."

Chell glanced over her shoulder at Michelle, fidgeting with the straps on her binoculars. Giving up, Chell picked up the pad of paper and pencil and began scribbling.

"He left because he knew I was unsure. My cube told me he's having second thoughts; he has made me the deity to his fucked-up religion."

Michelle's eyebrows raised as she read the words scrawled across the page. "Is that so? And how do you feel about this? What exactly is going on, Chell?"

Chell shook her head. She didn't want to talk about it. She didn't want to worry anyone in case Rattmann's warnings were just a false alarm. _"You just can't trust a man you just met, who's obviously suffering from some paranoid delusions..."_

Michelle took the hint and returned to looking out over the fields with her binoculars. She knew over time the former test subject would tell her what was wrong.

~x~

Chell shut her apartment door and fell back against it. A shaky breath escaping her as she slid down onto the floor, her back pressed firmly against the door, she buried her face into her hands. She knew this was all her fault, if only she'd just agreed to help him when he asked her. He'd be still here, and they'd be a few steps closer to safety - for everyone.

After a minute or two in complete silence, The Cube spoke up, _You're home. Good. I think you might be glad to know that the GLaDOS chassis hasn't exploded just yet. _

_ "Shut up. You think I don't know that?" _Chell thought, the words strung together like a stream of venom.

_Oh, I forgot how much you hate sarcasm. I'll stop, I promise. But just so you know, he was here today. _

Chell stood up instantly and glanced around the apartment; a hopeful look on her face. She heard the Cube chuckle.

_He left, but not after leaving you a gift in the kitchen... Don't worry it isn't deadly, or dead. He seemed to think you might like it. I'm not sure you will though..._

Chell nodded and poked her head into the kitchen. On the counter sat a large painted canvas. The painting was breathtakingly radiant; a setting sun in a purple, clouded sky overlooked the golden fields where they had met. There was a clearing in the centre of the field where a dark-haired woman (Chell, most likely) was dressed in a long, flowing, white dress that was swaying slightly in the wind. Above her, a companion cube with wings and a halo floated up into the clouds; a sign of freedom, she thought.

Chell stepped closer to examine the painting further. Upon further glance, Chell noticed words and symbols lined the edges of the painting; the dominant ones being words such as angel, freedom, savior and silence but there were also words she recognized from the song she had listened to hundreds of times. _Did you fall for the same empty answers again?_ Chell couldn't believe her eyes.

_I'm guessing you like it. I don't know where the hell he found that canvas, or the paint, but anything for his goddess I guess._ The Cube's rambling broke Chell's concentration and made her growl softly. The cube just had to go and ruin it for her.

Chell stood up straight and was going to move the canvas into the living room was a sudden moment from behind her caught her eye. Going into instant defensive mode, she spun around quickly and readied herself to attack, only to see nothing there.

_Imagining things again? _She heard the Cube call out to her from the bedroom. She shook it off and carried the canvas out into the living room.

Setting the painting down next to the couch, Chell felt the overwhelming exhaustion that came with the long day at work. Flopping down on the couch, she kicked off her Long Fall Boots and leaned her head back, her eyes slowly sliding shut.

~x~

When Chell awoke, the room was pitch black. She sat up and looked down at herself; still in her work clothes. She must have fallen asleep after finding the painting. Slowly standing up, Chell stumbled her way through the dark and into her bedroom.

She began to strip, leaving only her panties and bra on as she clambered into bed. She dully noted the time; 1:27AM. Curling into fetal position, Chell sighed as she let herself fall back asleep.

But suddenly, she noticed she wasn't alone. Another human lay beside her, already asleep and snoring softly. Chell shot up out of the bed and screamed, waking the man.

Doug's eyes shot open as he heard the scream. He looked up at Chell, squinting through the darkness to see her slim, almost naked figure. "Ch-Chell?"

Chell screamed again and grabbed the closest thing she could find (a long, thin curtain rod). She began beating him with it, her screams becoming weaker as she pushed her body to beat on him harder.

He groaned and caught the rod in his hand, holding it steady. "Ch-Chell! Drattmann! I'm Drattmann!"

She stopped, her breathing heavy, the rod still held tightly in her hands. She watched as he sat up and ran his fingers through the thickly matted hair on his head, before running the same hand over his face and scraggily beard. Her face changed from that of fear to a mix of curiosity and shame.

"I think she wants to sleep by herself and she comes in to beat me with a curtain rod! I don't think I'll ever get women, Cici..." He spoke to his cube, which was sitting close to him. Chell noticed her cube was situated on the other side of the room; away from the bed. She figured he must have put it there so as not to get confused as to which cube was which.

He looked back up at Chell and smiled, "So what is it? You want me to sleep with you or in a separate room? Cici's getting jealous."

Chell glared viciously at the man before hissing, "What the hell are you doing here?"

He didn't answer, opting to rub the back of his neck instead. Chell noticed he was only wearing a pair of boxers, his clothes discarded in a messy pile at the end of the mattress. She blushed and looked away, then repeated her question, "What are you doing here?"

"Yeah yeah, I know. I'm thinking up a good answer for her," He spoke to his cube again, "Well of course I don't have a reason for being here! Oh please, you know I need you."

Chell felt like she'd just intruded on a lovers' quarrel. She took a step back to give them space, but Rattmann had already switched his attention back to her.

"You don't have to leave!" He twitched and reached out for her. Chell shook her head and pointed towards the living room.

"I'll... I'll leave you two alone. We can talk about this in the morning," Chell explained, backing out of the door. She watched "Drattmann" scramble to his feet.

"No! Stay! I promise I won't hurt you!"

Chell shook her head and began to shut the door.

"STAY!" He yelled, shoving his foot between the door and the frame. She saw him wince as the door slammed against his foot.

"You're going to wake the neighbors! Will you keep it down?" She whispered.

"Screaming! You screamed! Screaming is fine for you!"

He had a point.

"Fine, I'll stay, just, keep quiet. I don't want my neighbors to think I'm being attacked or something." Chell pushed open the door and dragged the man by the arm back to bed, listening to his soft little noises as he walked.

Sitting down on the edge of the mattress, Chell watched him carefully as he hugged his Companion Cube, softly cooing to it.

"What's your name? Your real name," She asked in a whisper, her voice too strained by her screaming from earlier to manage anything else. She knew damn well his name was not "Drattmann" and having a lot more questions she wanted to ask him, she thought it best to start with his name.

The man glanced at her, eyes wide as if she'd just asked him to marry her. He pointed to his dirtied lab coat on the floor and mumbled a string of barely audible words.

Leaning over and snatching the lab coat up, Chell gave it a quick look over before searching the pockets. She found an old employee key card in one of the pockets. She pulled it out and examined it.

"Doug?" She read the name on the card over and over. Then she compared the photo to its real life counterpart.

The photo was of a younger, cleaner, shaven version of the man. His eyes were exactly the same though, which frightened Chell a bit. The man in the photo had a tiny smile spread across his face; something she rarely saw in him now unless he was talking to "Cici" or the rare time she had caught him staring at her.

"Well Doug, I've had a long day. I'd like to go to-" Chell was interrupted by his arms wrapping around her shoulders and pulling her down onto the bed to lie down next to him. Her face flushed a deep red.

"Cici says it's alright if I spend the night beside you. I would never think of hurting Cici anyways, but you're tired and if it's okay with her, then it's okay with me."

Chell didn't know if he was making this up or if he really did find it perfectly reasonable for them to sleep together.

But she eventually gave up trying to decipher his strange ways. With his arms wrapped around her, she finally felt truly safe for once, which scared her and excited her all at once. Reluctantly, Chell's eyes fell closed as she drifted off into a peaceful sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> WHAT? WHAT? TWO UPDATES IN ONE WEEK? IMPOSSIBLE!

But it's true my friends! And Thanks to my editor, it wouldn't have been possible! Hopefully she's working on Chapter 8 and 9 now so I can post them soon!

Things are getting pretty intense guys, I hope you're ready! Thanks to everyone who read and review! I love you all!


	8. Falling

Troubled Minds

**Chapter eight: Falling**

Doug couldn't believe what he had just done. He stared down at the sleeping form of the woman in his arms, a mixture of shock and joy in his old, blue eyes. She had literally fallen asleep instantaneously in his arms. She hadn't argued, she hadn't pushed him away or gotten mad, she had just... accepted it.

_Don't get too comfy... I'm still here you know._ The companion cube, which he had affectionately nicknamed Cici, was sitting right behind him. He could practically feel her smooth cold surfaces against his bare back.

"You're getting jealous now? I thought you said it was alright?" Doug whispered, still staring at the sleeping figure in his arms.

_She may be your savior, but I've been here for you since the beginning. _

"I know. You'll always be my number one."

_How long has it been?_ Cici's question surprised and confused him

"Since what?"

_How long has it been since you've lied in bed with a woman?_

Doug couldn't remember. He'd spent years in isolation; away from humans so long he couldn't even remember how to speak properly around them, hence his constant rambling and insane bursts of random noises. He glanced over his shoulder at the loving construct, a scowl crossing his face.

_That long huh? I'm surprised you haven't tried to -_

Doug cut Cici off before the cube could finish: "I would never do anything like that to Chell." He didn't even want to think of doing anything sexual to anyone. He wasn't ready for that right now.

_Fair enough. What about the bigger problem? It's obvious Chell isn't too keen on going back into Aperture. I don't think you want to, either._

Doug shook his head and sighed, tightening his hug around Chell. The woman stirred in her sleep, taking a deep breath and nuzzling in closer to his slightly hairy chest. He could feel his face get warm, a slight blush rising under his thick facial hair.

"I'll do what I must. If that means doing it by myself then I will," Doug whispered.

Just then Chell wiggled softly and Doug watched as a tiny, joyous smile flashed across her face. _Aw, how cute. She's dreaming!_ Cici's voice rang through his head.

Doug ignored the sarcasm and watched Chell's chest rise slowly with each breath she took. "She's beautiful when she sleeps, I've always known that, but I can't help but smile now that I'm seeing her - touching her - so close up."

Cici's voice became quieter, _You might not need me anymore, now that you have Chell._

"That's not true, I'll always need you."

_Let's hope you will._

Doug had nothing else to say. He had an incredible feeling in his gut. It was an extraordinary feeling, thrilling even, as if he was falling from a very high building. It terrified and excited him all at once.

Closing his eyes, he heard Cici's voice say one last thing before he drifted off into sleep again.

_Goodnight Doug, don't let her get away..._

~x~

Doug awoke to find he was in the makeshift bed alone; the only other things in the room were the two companion cubes. Tiredly sitting up, he rubbed the back of his neck, scratched his beard and looked out through the open door and into the living room.

Getting up, knees cracking, Doug followed the scent of food through the living room and into the kitchenette where he found Chell. She stood at the stove, cooking what looked to be a heaping mound of oddly shaped meat. The smell was gamey - like that of some forest animal.

"Good morning," He grumbled, sitting down at the kitchen table, where a cup of weak coffee already awaited him. He smiled and took a loud, long slurp.

Chell took a quick peek at him over her shoulder, flashing him a quick grin before returning to her cooking. She wore a plain, slim-fitting, white t-shirt and a pair of ripped up jeans. Her hair was down and hung in loose curls around her shoulders. She kept her eyes on the meat that was cooking and asked nicely, "Did you sleep well?"

Doug took another sip of coffee before answering, "Yes, thank you."

Chell turned and set a plate filled with meat, toast and some canned fruit onto the table in front of him. He looked up, questioningly, and she simply said, "It's venison. We have to hunt for our fresh meat now-a-days. Ever since the apocalypse it's getting harder to find fresh food..."

Doug nodded. He had been filled in by what was now going on in the world now by Chell's co-workers and the medics who had patched up his wounds. He had rambled on, seemingly ignoring them while he cooed softly to Cici. But he had heard them; listened to what they said, and he understood completely what had been going on.

"Thank you," He mumbled, picking up his fork and stabbing into a chunk of canned pineapple. He chewed it slowly, savoring the taste - it'd been a long time since he had fruit. Canned beans had become sickening after the tenth hundred can...

Chell sat down across from him, her plate filled with more fruit than meat. Doug gave her a questionable look and she simply replied with, "You're just skin and bones. You look like you're going to die any minute."

Doug felt his face get red and looked down at his body. Years of a diet consisting only of canned beans, water and spoiled milk had caused his body to thin down to the tiny, fragile cage of bones and skin that was sitting across the table from the beautiful, curvy figure that made up Chell's body. Doug chuckled softly and thought about how odd a pair they were; he was so ugly and she was... indescribable.

Chell began to scarf down her food, the silence was thick between them. Doug began to eat his own plate of food, chewing slowly to savor each and every bite.

Suddenly her voice cut through the silence and Doug's ears perked up, "Thank you, by the way."

Doug looked up at her to see her staring intensely at him with her deep blue-grey eyes. "For what?" He asked, genuinely unaware as to what she was so gracious for.

"For saving me. For leading me to freedom. For never giving up on me. For everything. But mostly, for everything that happened last night."

Doug stayed silent, the memory of having her curled up in his arms gave him an odd feeling he just couldn't shake.

"I've been so alone for so long and it was just... It was really comforting to have someone to hold onto..."

Doug smirked and took a bite of the venison, the gamey taste washing over his tongue. "It's been forever since I've been around humans. I feel like I'm getting less crazy the more time I spend around you."

The woman blinked absentmindedly and finished the fruit on her plate. She resorted back to her mute ways and Doug sighed, content with the sudden silence.

He finished his meal and watched as Chell stood to clean the dishes in the sink. Doug finished off his coffee and stood up, following the young woman to the sink and setting his empty mug into the basin.

"Why aren't you at your look out wall today? You work during the day time don't you?" He asked, leaning against the counter.

"I have a few days off. We have a cycle; one week working, one week off."

Doug nodded, it sounded much like the scheduling at Aperture before Mr. Johnson forced everyone to practically live at the facility. He peered over her shoulder as Chell filled the sink with warm, soapy water.

"I've been thinking," She mused, her eyes fixed on the dishes she was wiping clean. "About your offer..."

"Cici tells me you aren't too keen on going back."

"As much as that's true... I've been considering it."

Doug blinked and said nothing, he wanted to hear her reasoning behind it. But she didn't continue on. Instead, she worked steadily at the dishes, focusing on getting rid of a stain on one of the plates.

"Well? Are you going to help me or not?" Doug asked, his voice a little assertive. He didn't mean to sound so demanding, but it had slipped out of his mouth.

Chell turned and glared at him, her brows furrowed. "Well for one, I will never want to return back to that place. Never."

"But the compound is in danger. These people are in danger. Your friends will end up dead."

Chell was silent for a moment, contemplating it, before dropping the dishes back into the sink and drying her hands off on a tea towel. She sighed and said softly, "Fine. I'll help you."

Doug was ecstatic, he grabbed her by the shoulders and smiled happily. Chell's eyes widened and he could see his reflection in their glossiness. The two stared into each other's eyes for a moment. Doug could feel his heart beating in his throat, his chest tightening as he stared at the woman.

Without warning, Doug leaned down and pressed his lips against hers. Chell struggled for a few seconds as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pressing his lips harder against her own. Finally she gave in, her arms curling around him as she kissed back.

A sense of passion shot through them and Doug could feel Chell's grip tightening against his back. Doug felt her lips part slightly and he imitated her, feeling her hot breath on his cheeks. A rush of excitement running through his blood, Doug pulled away, looking into her eyes again. A tiny smile played across her lips and he knew right away that she'd be there for him. No matter what.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>MUHAHAHA! I've updated! I'm so sorry for taking so long to update. My editor (the amazing Vampirelady666 on tumblr) has been ill lately and I've been so busy with my classes at university that I haven't had time to even sleep let alone do any personal stuff! But it's Thanksgiving weekend and I have a whole three days to update! WOO! So enjoy! I hope you all like this chapter. Again, not long, but I hope its good. (omg so many Chelley fans that read this are gonna flip their shit on me - I REGRET NOTHING)


	9. Fear

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Nine: Fear**

Chell pulled away from Doug and stared up at him. Shock washed over her face as she realized what she had just done. She felt his breath, still hot on her neck. It felt nice to have someone so close but...

Chell gently pushed him away, causing him to lift his head and look at her. His eyes. His eyes were so strangely beautiful, she could feel herself getting lost in them.

_"No! I can't get myself distracted! I promised to help him, not get involved with the guy! I barely know him!"_

_ Looks like your having a bit of an internal dilemma there, Chell._ She heard her cube crack up in the other room.

Chell was still staring deeply into Doug's eyes, his soft, musky scent filling the air around him; he hadn't showered in awhile, a mixture of sweat and cologne filled her nostrils. "_He must have used the cologne to cover up the bad scent when the water stopped working in the facility..."_

_ Focus, Chell. You have two options; run or stay._

Chell ran. Slipping out of his arms gracefully, she flashed him a nervous grin and headed straight for the door to the apartment.

"Where are you going?" She heard his voice crack through the thick air.

"Um, I have some errands to run. I'll be back soon," She lied, avoiding eye contact.

"Do you want me to escort you?" His voice sounded desperate for her to stay. She turned her back to him, hand on the doorknob, anxious to flee the scene of the dastardly crime she had just committed.

"It's fine, I'll only be gone for a few hours. Make yourself at home. There's running water in the bathroom; you probably haven't had that in awhile, right?" She stated simply. But before he could answer she slipped past the door and into the hallway, shutting it quickly.

Sighing, she headed off down the hall towards the staircase. She couldn't help but wrap her arms around herself in a sort of hug, as if she was cold, as she quickened her pace, heading towards Michelle's apartment.

Doug blinked, staring confused at the doorway where Chell had been standing only moments ago. He didn't understand what had just happened. Hadn't they just been sharing something beautiful together? Did she not like what he had done? Doug just didn't understand women.

_Looks like she's got a case of cold feet. Oh well, now I have you all to myself again. _Cici bragged.

"She's just confused. I shouldn't have done that, that was stupid of me. She probably will want to change her mind now..." Doug chastised himself, running a hand over her face. He felt too old; terrible.

_Hey... I didn't mean that. She's probably just a little shaken up. She'll come around, you know she will. She's too stubborn to give up. It's not your fault, Doug. You acted in the heat of the moment. Besides, she looked like she was enjoying it..._

Doug couldn't help but chuckle as Cici reminded him of how Chell had held onto him tightly; pressing herself against him as their lips met. A tiny grin crossed his lips as he thought about the kiss.

_You liked it too, didn't you?_ Cici teased.

Doug shot a dirty look in the general direction of Chell's bedroom, where Cici and Chell's cube were still situated. He didn't reply, but he knew Cici already knew the answer. He turned towards the bathroom and he smiled. "I haven't showered in awhile... I wonder if she noticed? Well it doesn't matter now."

He walked into the bedroom and picked Cici up, smiling softly at the construct. The hearts on each side glowed weakly, a sign she was older. Doug hugged the cube tightly, nuzzling his face into the cold, smooth steel.

"Don't worry, I'll clean you too." He cooed, carrying Cici into the bathroom with him. He set the large cube down on the toilet seat and studied his surroundings.

The bathroom was small and tiled in grimy, once-white ceramic. The shower was rather large, the tub was victorian style and Doug could see the exposed, rusted pipes running up the wall, curving sharply and ending in a large, rounded shower head. The curtain surrounding the tub had a cheesy floral pattern and was tattered, but still seemed to do it's job. Doug turned to the sink and noticed the large crack in the mirror, as if Chell had gotten angry and punched it.

Doug ignored the crack in the mirror to take a good long look at himself. He was hideous; an eyesore in comparison to his tenacious host. He wondered if Chell had ever felt ugly like he did and the crack in the mirror was the result of a random fit of rage and self loathing. Pulling and prodding at his face, Doug studied himself, finding flaw after flaw.

_Don't think like that, you're handsome. _Cici spoke up.

Doug smirked, "Yeah, sure."

He looked away and searched the surface of the counter, finding a tube of cinnamon flavored toothpaste, a toothbrush, hairbrush and deodorant. He looked around and found what he wanted in a shower caddy that was suction cupped to the wall; a razor and shaving cream.

Doug smiled, his slightly yellowed teeth peeking out from behind the bushy, dark beard that covered his face. He reached for the shaving cream and razor, and lathered himself up, getting right to work.

~x~

Chell rapped her knuckles against the wooden door of the apartment that was situated two floors below her own. A few minutes later, a tired looking, messy-haired Michelle appeared in the doorway, rubbing her eyes and still in her pajamas.

"Chell? What are you doing here? You never come to visit me," Michelle began, but immediately changed her tone once she saw the look on Chell's face. "Wh-what's wrong? Come on in! You look like you just saw a ghost!"

Chell nodded and stepped inside, sliding past her friend and into the apartment. She immediately sat at the breakfast nook and buried her face in her hands. Michelle sat beside her and began softly patting her on the back. Chell's chest heaved, she tried so hard not to, but ended up sobbing silently.

"Chell, sweetie, are you okay? Did something happen?" Michelle cooed.

Chell nodded and cleared her throat, "He came back."

The sudden sound of her voice shocked Michelle, and she sat speechless as the former mute sobbed quietly. She regained her composure, and whispered, "Did something happen between you two?"

Chell's shoulders shook as she let out a much louder sob, "I slept with him."

"YOU WHAT?" Michelle spat.

"It's not like that! We... We only slept. I don't think I could bring myself to do anything like _that," _Chell's voice shook violently as she spoke. "He... I found him sleeping in my bed and he begged me to stay by his side. It was like he was terrified or something. Like a child suffering from nightmares. I felt so sorry for him."

Michelle stayed silent, taking in what Chell was telling her. She shook her head slowly, _unbelievable_. She managed to encourage her, "Go on. What happened this morning to make you so upset?"

Chell paused, breathing in slowly to calm herself down. Finally she spoke, "He... I agreed to help him. I just want to keep everyone safe and-"

An audible, shaky moan left her lips and Michelle hugged her friend. "It's okay, if he hurt you I'll-"

"He didn't hurt me... He... We kissed."

Michelle leaned back and stared down at her friend, "What's so bad about that?"

Chell didn't respond, instead, she wiped the tears from her blue-grey eyes and smiled, "There's nothing wrong with it, really, I'm just afraid."

"Afraid? Of what?"

Chell looked down at her hands, the smile fading, "I'm afraid that I might... love him."

Silence filled the room once again, and Michelle stroked the hair on Chell's head slowly. Chell could hear her heartbeat, faster and faster. Fear ran through her blood as she realized this would probably not end very well.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> Oh hey! I've been really busy! But it's THANKSGIVING WEEKEND! Hooray! So we recently got a puppy (last night!) and so all day today I've been running around the house and playing with her! She's so freaking cute! w Her name is Luna. Anyways, Thanks again to my editor and Hopefully chapters 10 and 11 will be edited soon! I'm also working on chapter 12 this week and maybe chapter 13. YAY! I'm also working on some Comics! Woo! So check out my Deviantart (look for link on my profile) for those!

Thanks! Please read and review!


	10. Fake Frowns

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Ten: Fake Frowns**

Doug smiled down at his cube shaped companion, staring at his distorted reflection in her steel plates. All his hard work scrubbing the dirt, grime and blood off of Cici's steel plates had paid off, revealing a glistening new sheen to the old construct. He knew very well that if she could, Cici would be smiling right back up at him.

After finishing that, Doug moved onto taking care of himself. He had already shaved, barely recognizing his former self as he stared into the mirror, but now he needed to wash. His calloused, rough hands wrapped themselves instinctively around Cici and lifted her out of the bathtub, gently letting her rest on a towel on the floor. He gave the cube a quick, loving pat before letting his ragged, stained clothes fall to the floor and taking her place in the bathtub.

Doug let out a yelp of discomfort and shivered almost violently as the freezing water splashed over his naked form. He tried turning the knobs to make the water warmer, but it seemed the building had no hot water heating system and the water only seemed to get colder.

_At __least __the __water __works __here,_ Cici chimed.

Doug laughed out loud and began to scrub himself clean. She had a point; he would have died for this in Aperture. He let the scent of goat's milk and baby powder wash over him as the suds of soap that enveloped his body began to swirl down the drain. He closed his eyes and let himself breathe in the soft aroma that Chell's soaps and body washes left behind.

Finally he grabbed the closest bottle of shampoo (a bottle that was a dark blue colour, with the scent of carrots and blueberries emanating from the cap) and poured the thick gel-like liquid onto his head. He began rubbing his fingers through his hair, lathering the soap up. He moved his hands in tiny circles, scratching at his scalp with his cracked nails. It felt good to finally be able to be clean.

_It __won__'__t __last __very__l ong, _Cici warned him. _You__'__re __going __back __soon. __She__'__ll __probably __trap __you __in __that __facility __and __force __you __to __test. __Chell __too._

She was right. She always was. But Doug shook the thought from his mind. "I can fix Her. Override the system. I... I've done it before. I just need Chell's help to get to the main breaker room."

_And __even __then __it__'__ll __be __dangerous. __You __might __not __make __it __out __alive. __And __She __won__'__t __be __shut __down __for __good. __Her __current __test __subjects __are __fine __for __now, __but __She__'__s __getting __restless, __the __test __subjects __are __slow, __She __wants __another __Chell._

Doug rinsed his hair, already missing the scent of the shampoo as the suds ran down his back and around his feet. He knew leading Chell back into Aperture would only hurt them both.

_Are __you __sure __you __want __to __do __this? __You__'__re __leading __Chell __right __to __her. __Right __into __her __trap..._

Doug looked down at his feet, a somber look to his odd eyes.

~x~

Chell breathed in deeply, the aroma of rotting wood and decay filling her lungs. She stood outside her apartment door, her hand hovering over the doorknob. Her recent conversation with Michelle had ended in an unexpected therapy session that Chell deemed unnecessary. Confessing to Michelle was a bad idea; she liked to overanalyze and think things in a therapist's mindset rather than a normal, friendly mindset. Michelle had bombarded Chell with questions, trying to get to the "deeper meaning" behind her actions. But the truth was, Chell didn't even know if there was any real "deeper meaning" by what she had done other than that she was lonely and a part of her (a very small part of her) _missed_ Aperture Science. Doug was her only living connection to Aperture, it was only natural for her to cling to him in the hope of staying connected to her past.

Sighing, she opened the door and walked into the apartment, letting the door swinging shut behind her. She immediately heard shuffling and a voice called out from the bathroom.

"Oh you're home! I'll be out in a minute!"

Chell's face stayed blank, emotionless. She ignored the sound of his voice and went over to the kitchen sink, splashing some water onto her face and patting it dry with a tea towel.

"There you are... Can I ask you a favor?" Rattmann asked.

She spun around and almost screamed. He stood in the doorway, his face cleanly shaven and his eyes as intensely gorgeous as ever. His hair was wet and slicked back and he was wearing only his dress shirt and a pair of boxers. Chell hardly recognized him.

"Ahh, right. I sh-shaved. B-but could you... could you help me wrap up this bullet wound? It's hard for me to do it without wincing in pain," He tried to explain himself, rubbing the back of his neck shyly.

Chell's eyes shot down to his leg, where his wound was left open, she could practically see right through it, the blood beginning to dry up and scab over. She pointed to the kitchen table and glared up at him. He took the hint and sat down on one of the rickety old chairs.

She disappeared into the bathroom before returning with a large bag labelled first aid kit. Sitting gracefully on the floor, she began applying a healing ointment, that smelled terrible, to the wound. She watched his face scrunch up into a very exaggerated wince as she applied the ointment.

"That stings!" He commented, but it wasn't a complaint. It was more of an observation.

Chell gingerly wrapped a large amount of gauze around the wound, being extra careful not to hurt him or look him in the eye. She could feel her face getting warmer as he smiled down at her, his fingers drumming against his thin belly.

Finishing the wrapping, Chell tapped her finger against his knee and stood back up.

"Thanks," Doug whispered, slowly rising to his feet. He gently put pressure on his leg, testing how much weight the leg could hold before collapsing. When he figured it all out, he swooped Chell into his arms, pulling her into a tight hug.

That was it. She couldn't handle this anymore. Chell let out a muffled sob, her face buried into his shirt, she let out every tear she had been holding back since her freedom. Her hands balled up into fists as she clung to him.

Doug was speechless. He had no idea what had become of the woman, nor how to comfort her in her time of need. Instead, he opted to pat her gently on her back as she sobbed uncontrollably into his shirt.

After a few minutes, Chell stopped crying and looked up into his eyes, her own grey-blue eyes shining wet with tears still. She smiled and whispered, "That felt good."

Doug had no idea what she meant, but the smile on her face made him feel better about himself and he couldn't help but flash an awkward, crooked grin back at her. He watched as she wiped her face on her sleeves and regained her composure, the smile on her face fading only lightly.

_I __don__'__t __understand, __just __an __hour __ago, __she __was __acting __as __if __you __were __the __worst __person __on __the __planet, __now __she__'__s __clinging __to __you __for __dear __life. __I __just __don__'__t __get __women... _Cici called out from the bathroom. Doug ignored her, opting to stare into Chell's smiling face.

"You... You look so much younger without the beard," Chell suddenly spoke. Her hand flew up and gently touched his smooth, clean face.

"Ugh... do I?" He asked, his face reddening.

"Can... Can I ask how old you are? Were? I mean..."

"When it all happened, you mean?"

Chell's face went red like his, and she nodded curtly.

"Thirty-seven," He replied simply, his hand dropping to his sides. She still clung to his shirt.

"That makes you... Twelve years older than me... I was twenty-five when I began testing..." She seemed to be distracted by her thoughts, staring off at the wall behind them.

"You were twenty-six actually. I remember watching your beta-test runs before they put you back into stasis. I read over your file, as well," He couldn't for the life of him know how he remembered that. But he stared down at her anyways, her smile still faint on her lips.

"I... Thank you. By the way," She pulled away from him and began to make her way into the living room. "If it wasn't for you, I'd probably be dead by now."

Doug didn't know what to say. For so long he'd thought she'd hate him for putting her through the living hell she went through, when all along she was just glad to be alive. He felt like crying himself.

Instead he followed her into the living room and then, realizing he wasn't wearing trousers still, he immediately went into the bathroom to pull them on. Chell had situated herself on the couch and was flipping through the two or three channels the compound was able to get on her old, black and white television. Doug poked his head out of the bathroom after he had finished dressing and watched her from afar.

_"__How __can __I __drag __her __back __into __that __hellhole? __She__'__s __happy __now. __She__'__s __living __a __normal, __happy __life. __She __doesn__'__t __need __this. __I __should __do __it __alone,__" _The thoughts flew through his mind as he returned to the damp bathroom and stared at Cici.

_Don__'__t __look __at __me. __You __and __your __co-workers __are __to __blame __for __creating __GLaDOS __in __the __first __place._

"Doug?" Chell's voice called out from the living room.

Doug's eyes widened and he quickly picked up his companion cube, carrying it out into the living room and letting it drop softly on the floor beside Chell. She shifted to make room and he sat down next to her.

The television was muted, and Doug watched as Frank Sinatra crooned silently at them. An awkward stillness filled the air between them and he could hear the voices that followed him around try to fill the void.

The silence was finally broken when Chell whispered, "About this morning..."

"What about it?" He asked, curious about her odd behavior after their kiss.

"That... That was just a mistake, alright? It meant nothing."

Doug felt his chest tighten up and his heart begin to crack. His breathing became quicker and he felt an overwhelming sadness fill him. _"__Mistake?__"_

_I __forgot, __you__'__ve __never __really __been __one __to __date, __have __you? __I__'__ll __give __you __a __tip; __the __pain __you__'__re __feeling __in __your __chest? __That__'__s __you__'__re __heart __being __broken __into __a __million __pieces._ Cici's voice cut through the air like a knife through butter.

"Yeah, right. I just... We got caught up in the moment. That's all," Doug managed, trying to laugh it off. But somehow he couldn't ignore the cracking feeling in his chest.

Chell felt terrible. She didn't dare look at him. She knew damn well she had lied. She had enjoyed every single minute of what had happened, but she didn't want that to get to her head. So instead, she hoped he'd understand. They barely knew each other! She decided she'd leave all personal feelings behind and finish this mission with a very strict business-like attitude.

"I... I'm going to go pack. We can leave for Aperture tomorrow," Chell stood up, her hand brushing lightly against his as she rushed into her bedroom, almost slamming the door shut behind her.

Doug stared blankly at the television, which now flashed a commercial warning people to stay inside during the zombie apocalypse.

_Maybe __coming __to __the __surface __was __a __bad __idea...? _Cici suggested. Doug blinked, trying as hard as he could to hold back the tears welling up in his eyes.

She was right. She was always right...

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Gahh! Long time no update! Sorry about that guys, enjoy this chapter! Bonus points to the first person who can name where the title of the chapter comes from ;D  
>Anyways, I'll try to have chapter 11 up tonight as well, but I'm busy with Drawing homework so it may have to wait for tomorrow or thursday! Sorry!<p> 


	11. The End of The World

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Eleven: The End Of The World**

Chell hadn't slept at all that night. Curled over her cup of coffee as she sat at the kitchen table that morning, Doug could tell she was still very tired. He didn't say anything as he finished his second cup of coffee.

After a moment or two of silence, Chell's soft, raspy voice cut through the air, "Are you ready?"

Doug nodded curtly, his face grim. It was a blatant lie. He would never be ready to return to that hellhole but he didn't dare let her know that. He stood up and fixed the hand-made mechanism that carried Cici on his back.

"Um, if you don't mind... I'd like a few minutes by myself... I'll meet you in the lobby," Chell's voice was barely audible.

"Oh, r-right yes, of course," Doug replied, ducking his head and rushing towards the door to the apartment. He glanced back longingly at her before respecting her wishes and shutting the door behind him.

Once alone, Chell broke down. "I can't do it! I can't do it! I just... I can't!"

_Then __why __did __you __offer __to __help? __Why __didn__'__t __you __just __ignore __him? __Leave __him __to __die __in __the __fields?_

Chell was silent, she tried hard to ignore the sound of the cube's voice as she tried to pull herself together. Standing up and striding over to the living room, she took a few deep breaths before whispering, "This is the end. The end of the world."

The cube was silent.

~x~

Doug smiled weakly as Chell made her way toward him. "All good?" he asked.

She nodded, a small smile crossing her lips, but her eyes showed she wasn't very happy. Doug felt the guilt grow worse as she adjusted the knapsack full of food, clothes and other supplies needed to sustain them through their journey on her back.

"Let's go. It'll take us a few hours to get there," She said flatly and walked past the doorman whose eyes were wide with shock; apparently hearing her voice for the first time.

Doug followed close behind, his weaker leg making it hard to keep up with the younger, more agile woman. But he put in the effort to keep up with her, losing his breath as he went. It didn't hurt that she was wearing her long fall boots.

They walked through the complex and towards the great wall surrounding the little community, an uncomfortable silence forming between them. Doug's head started to fill up with the haunting voices again and he sighed.

"What is it?" Chell asked, turning to look at him.

"N-nothing. Really," He lied.

"You're lying."

"I'm not. It's really nothing."

Chell's face twisted into a look of disbelief. "I don't believe you. Tell me what's wrong."

Doug looked away from her. He really didn't want to tell her how crazy he was. Just being around her made him fell better; like he was sane again, telling her would just make her think badly of him. It would probably make him revert back to his old crazy self as well.

Suddenly her hand flew up and forcibly turned his face towards hers. "Doug. Tell me what is wrong."

The fierce intensity of her eyes made him sigh again, giving up. "I'm hearing voices again."

Chell's eyes didn't move away from his face. She stayed silent, her hand still had a firm grip on his chin. Doug felt embarrassed telling her that he could hear voices in his head, telling him things he really didn't like to hear, but the way she looked at him now, with concern in her eyes, made him feel slightly better.

"You've suffered for so long..." She whispered.

"You've suffered worse," He whispered back, taking her hands in his own. She began to shake her head, denying it, but he caught her chin and lifted her face up towards his own. He leaned in, ready to plant a small kiss on her lips, but she pulled away.

"We should keep going. We haven't even made it out of the complex yet," she stated, avoiding the obvious romantic moment they had just shared.

Doug mentally scolded himself for being so foolish, and nodded. He began to follow her as they reached the wall and began the procedure of unlocking the large metal doors that separated the complex from the wheat fields.

Once outside of the wall, she took a deep, shaky breath and started towards the shack. Doug followed closely behind as Cici began rambling on to fill the silence.

_She__'__s __quite __the __catch. __I __mean, __she__'__s __stubborn __as __hell __and __she__'__s __put __you __in __the __friend __zone __already. __She__'__s __obviously __got __some __sort __of __social __anxiety._

Doug ignored the cube's snide remarks and continued on through the grass. Watching as Chell's ponytail swung from side to side as her head bobbed up and down, Doug smiled, he hadn't meant to woo her, just meeting her was enough for him.

Cici scoffed, _And __yet, __you __still __feel __that __pain __in __your __chest... __Humans __really __are __strange __creatures._

~x~

They had been walking for hours, and Chell was starting to notice that Doug was getting tired. They stopped at a small clearing in the grass and sat down to have the lunch Chell had packed.

Chell pulled out two tin-foil wrapped chunks of cooked meat; more venison. She gingerly handed one of the little packets to Doug and watched as he tore through it like a rabid animal. Usually she'd be disgusted with that kind of behavior, turning away and grimacing. But because she knew his circumstances, what with not having much food while in Aperture, she understood his eagerness to eat.

Chell chewed slowly as they sat in complete silence. The only sound was that of the wind and the crinkling sound of tin-foil being moved in order to get the food inside it. Chell almost felt peaceful - safe again - as she let the wind rustle her hair slightly and the grass tickle her skin.

"Why do you call her Cici?" Chell asked, breaking the silence. She had been curious about the strange nickname since she first heard him say it.

Doug looked up and wiped some food from his chin with his sleeve. Swallowing what he had in his mouth, he stared at Chell blankly before replying simply, "Companion Cube. C.C. Cici."

Chell felt slightly ashamed for not have getting the reference. "Right," She whispered, returning to her food.

"I know she can't hear you! That's why I explained it for her!" Doug muttered and turned his attention toward the cube on his back.

Chell had no idea what was going on, but she stayed quiet as he conversed under his breath with the cube. She didn't find the sight odd at all, she spoke with her cube all the time. She saw no harm in it. But she knew it was quite the odd sight and that most people would have him committed to a psychiatric ward.

Suddenly Doug looked up at her and gave her a lopsided grin. Chell blinked, a little confused, before he stood up and came to sit beside her. He stretched his arms above his head and took in a deep, satisfying breath before tossing his empty tin-foil package into the fields. Chell noticed him shiver and frowned, the air was much chillier today and his clothing was thin and tattered.

Worried, Chell dug around in her ransack, pulling out an oversized sweater and shoving it into his hands. "For me?" He asked, surprise in his voice.

She nodded, a tiny smile flickering across her face before returning to its stoic normality. Doug pulled the sweater over his head and smiled at its warmth. "Thank you."

_You __must __feel __terrible __right __now,_ Cici cooed languidly.

Doug ignored the cube and focused his attention on Chell, her hair was pulled up into its signature ponytail and she was wearing thick, military style clothing. He watched as she finished the meat and threw the foil out into the sea of wheat and grass. She stood up and brushed herself off, before packing up and waiting for him to follow her.

Doug stood up and gave her another lopsided grin then began trekking through the grass towards the shed again. Chell was always two steps ahead.

~x~

The sun was beginning to set when they arrived at the shed. Chell had made it to the shed a few minutes before and stood in front of it, tapping the toe of her long fall boots on the packed dirt ground. Doug felt ashamed for not being able to keep up and decided not to mention it.

But Chell felt differently. She was rather upset with herself for emotionally pushing him away, and took it upon herself to try hard to avoid eye contact with him. She tapped her foot in impatience, but on the inside, she felt terrible that she hadn't slowed down to walk with him.

_Do __you __really __want __to __do __this __Doug? __You__'__re __walking __straight __into __her __trap..._ Cici warned. Doug sighed, it was true, and he would be to blame for this. Guilt weighed him down.

"Are you ready?" Chell's voice shook him from his internal battle.

"Hmm? Yes are you?"

"No. Never."

"Then I guess it's time."

Doug Rattmann hated himself at the moment. But that didn't stop himself from reaching over and intertwining his fingers with Chell's. They took one last look at the outside world before the aluminum door to the shed swung open and they stepped inside.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's note:<strong> Short chapter is short. Chapter 12 is where the action begins my friends! I will also be updating the rating to a Mature rating for some very obvious reasons in Chapter 13. Until then, stay classy and PLEASE read and review! Thanks everyone!


	12. Welcome Home

Troubled Minds

**Chapter 12: Welcome Home**

Darkness. That was all she could see. Chell's eyes had been so used to sunlight now that the stark contrast of Aperture's pitch black hung around her in thick clouds. After a few moments of squinting and feeling around in the dark, her eyes adjusted and she found the elevator she had stood in so long ago...

Rattmann smiled nervously and ushered her into the elevator, his eyes gleaming in the dark. She watched him squeeze in next to her and felt his breath against her neck. Her fingers twitched involuntarily, stretching to grasp at his hands. Chell was shaking, not because she was cold but because she was frightened. She couldn't remember the last time she had been so scared.

The sharp noise that indicated the lift's door was now sealed shut made her jump. Chell clung to Rattmann's sleeve as the lift began it's slow descent down the shaft. She could almost hear their heartbeats becoming louder as they went further and further into the depths of the facility.

_ "Oh look, the Rat is back. What's this? He's brought a friend along with him! Oh good, it's you. Welcome home, Chell."_

Chell knew that voice; the cold, sultry automated voice of the massive AI filled the room as the lift entered the central AI chamber. It was the first time Chell had heard GLaDOS use her name and it frightened her even more.

_"__[Subject:__Doug __Rattmann]. __Well __done. __You__'__ve __fulfilled __your __side __of __the __deal __and __brought __my __favorite __test __subject __home.__"_

Chell's face drained of all colour as she turned to look at Rattmann. He had his head hung low, hair falling in his face. Searing hatred ran through Chell's veins; this had all been a set up to bring her back. He had tricked her, just like so many before him.

_"__As __for __your __reward, __I__'__ve __decided __you __haven__'__t __done __quite __enough __yet.__"_

Chell watched as Rattmann's head shot up to look at the AI's large, yellow optic. His face had a mixture of uncertainty and fear. Chell's anger was beginning to rise, she could feel her nails digging deeper into the flesh of her palms as she tried desperately to stay calm.

_"__You __see, __testing __just __hasn__'__t __been __the __same __without __the __mute __lunatic, __and __now __that __she__'__s __back, __I __wanted __to __try __out __a __new __set __of __tests __that __require __the __cooperation __of __two __humans...__"_

Chell knew where this was going and she did _not_ like it. She began frantically scratching and clawing her way out of the glass, like a cat trapped in a box. Rattmann on the other hand, seemed to have accepted their fate, curling into a ball and mumbling a string of barely audible apologies, the cube attached to his back sat silent, as if mocking them.

Giving up, Chell spun around and was met face to face with the large, glowing, yellow light eminating from GLaDOS' optic. Chell was breathless as the AI watched them, a sense of amusement and curiousity in her movements, like a child watching mice run around in their cages...

_"__The __Rat __seems __to __have __reverted __back __to __his... __defective __nature. __This __will __definitely __make __for __some __interesting __test __results.__"_

Chell watched as the glass doors opened and GLaDOS summoned two claw-like mechanisms to drag them out. Rattmann let out a blood curdling scream and Chell tried her hardest to struggle and wiggle free from the claw's grasp.

_ "Oh. You actually have decent clothing! I thought you'd be homeless by now, but the Rat tells me you actually have been living pretty well, considering the apocalypse and all."_

Chell glared viciously at GLaDOS before grimacing at Doug. _How __could __he __have __spoken __with __her __when..._ Chell's eyes widened as she remembered the two days he had gone missing. _He __was __working __for __her __all __along._

Doug didn't dare look at Chell, instead he stared gloomily at the ground below them, shame washing over him as GLaDOS dangled them like ragdolls above her.

Her cold, monotonous voice filled the air again, _"__Well, __let__'__s __begin __the __testing __shall __we? __I__'__m __sure __you__'__re __positively __anxious __to __get __back __to __what __you __do __best.__"_

With that said, Chell and Doug were dropped down a large chute, and began flying off in opposite directions. Chell tried to clamber over to Doug, but the speed she gained in the tube was alarming and before she knew it, she was bouncing off the sides. Chell's head started to hurt, and it wasn't until she started to black out that she realized she had hit her head and was now spiraling through the tube faster than ever before.

~x~

Chell awoke in one of those cheesy motel inspired Relaxation vaults. The pounding in her head made her feel sick and she reached up to feel a large gauzed bandage covering what she assumed was a rather large wound. All she could remember was that Doug had betrayed her.

Doug had betrayed her. Her heart dropped and she hugged her knees, which she noticed were now covered by the same neon orange jumpsuit all test subjects wore. Her feet still wore her long fall boots and Chell bit her lip as she realized what had just happened.

There was a knocking on her door, and Chell felt an overwhelming sense of déjà vu as she got up to answer it. Instead of a moronic, british accented Personality core on the other side of the door, stood Doug, hunched over slightly with his cube attached to his back. Chell felt an overwhelming sense of rage fill her.

"Ch-Chell! Yo-you're alive! G-good. She wo-would not be happy i-if you w-were dead," His voice was broken and hoarse, as if he'd been screaming for a long time. He looked down at her with a sheepish smile; Chell was livid.

"How dare you? I TRUSTED YOU!" Chell screamed. It scared both Doug and herself; she hadn't screamed since she was a child.

"I... I was selfish, I..."

"Shut up! You think you can make it all better by just apologizing? You think I'm THAT gullible? First GLaDOS, then Wheatley, now you? WHAT DID I EVER DO TO DESERVE BEING HAUNTED BY THIS HELLHOLE?"

Doug stared down at his feet, ashamed to have let her get trapped again. He was supposed to protect her, he was supposed to be her key to freedom, but instead he had become desperate, mad even, for his own freedom and had made a deal with the AI herself to bring Chell back.

Suddenly Doug felt a petite, hard fist slam into the side of his face. Chell's shoulders heaved with heavy breaths as she slammed fist after fist into him, her anger being lashed out through the violence of her hands. It felt good to hurt; having bottled up her anger for so long, Chell felt almost relieved to be causing pain.

Doug quickly caught both her wrists and held them tightly as she tried to struggle against his strength. "I'm sorry I did this to you. I know how much you've been through; how so many betrayed you. But now is not the time for you to try bashing my head in. I think you forget who you are dealing with here," Doug's tone had changed, it was almost as if he had become someone completely different, "I know how to navigate this place better than anyone. I know it like the back of my hand, better than Her, even. I don't think you want to kill someone who saved your life and helped you to freedom."

Chell looked up into his strangely beautiful eyes and watched as her own eyes widened in the reflection. His voice was stern and serious, which scared her. She dropped her fists to her side and gritted her teeth. He was right. He was always right.

Doug sighed, "Look, I know you hate me now and you probably want me dead, but I want you to know that I never wanted this to happen. I got desperate, its so lonely down here by myself. Cici can only keep me company for so long. So I made the deal with GLaDOS that if I brought you back here, she'd..."

He paused, looking away for a second and sighing again before finishing, "She'd let me live freely on the surface. But the thing is... I can't see myself as a free man until I can see you beside me up there."

Chell hadn't made any sense of what he just said, but something about the way e spoke made her feel sad. He was so upset about what he'd done, he felt so much guilt...

Chell lifted herself up onto her tip-toes and wrapped her hands lovingly on his smooth chin. She said nothing; opting to look sadly into his eyes and give him a flicker of a smile before pressing her lips gently against his.

Doug felt a rush of passion flood over him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. They embraced for a few minutes, enjoying the distant hum of machinery that had cut through the silence. Doug buried his face into her neck and closed his eyes, content.

After a moment or two, Chell pulled away, staring him in the face blankly. "I'm still angry. I don't know if I can forgive you, but... I trust you. I don't know why, but I do. I know I shouldn't, but you've saved my life before, so..." Her voice trailed off as he planted another small, tender kiss on her cheek.

"We'll get through this. I promise, you can kill me after we get out of here," He whispered, then turned and began walking down the long, metal catwalk. "Come, we've got a long way to go."

~x~

They walked in complete silence for hours, the only sound was the distant, eerie hum of machinery that echoed through the facility and the loud, tinny sound of their footsteps along the metal catwalk. Doug hobbled along as Cici blathered on and on.

_Well __this __was __a __smart __idea. __You __know, __you __really __should __have __just __stayed __on __the __surface. __Chell __would __be __safe __and __you __would __have __been __free, __why __didn__'__t __you __just __ditch __the __plan __the __moment __you __got __up __there?_

"And risk GLaDOS having an actual meltdown?" Doug muttered, recieving a questioning glance from Chell, who was only a step or two ahead of him. He gestured to the cube situated on his back and Chell nodded, understanding right away.

Chell had noticed that Doug was also wearing Long Fall Boots now, and he wobbled and shook in them, obviously a little unused to balancing on the pads of his feet. She worried for him, but her sudden distrust in him caused her to stay stoic and emotionless around him. Chell pretended their earlier little outburst hadn't happened.

Chell still worried though. At the moment, they were defenceless; they weren't even in possesion of a portal gun and Chell knew that at some point GLaDOS would come looking for them and send them off to testing. The thought lingered in her mind as they made their way through the long and twisted catwalks of the facility.

"Wait," Rattmann's voice echoed through the large open space.

Chell stopped and turned to see the man crouching in front of a vent, staring into it with great interest. Sighing, she waltzed over to see what he was so intrigued by.

Doug pried open the vent and stuck his head in. It was large enough that a human could crawl through it. A mischievious smile crept upon his lips and he pulled his head out of the vent. "Come, safety this way."

She was reluctant at first, but after watching him scramble into the vent and disappear, Chell knelt down and watched him slowly crawl away from her. Not wanting to lose sight of him (for fear of distrust or of getting lost, she couldn't say), she crawled in after him and shuffled through the vent; staying only a foot or so behind him at all times.

It was an hour later when they finally emerged on the other end of the vent, Doug leaning and kicking in the vent cover with a surprising amount of strength for the frail, weak-looking body he had. Jumping down into the little den, Doug turned and reached out to catch Chell.

She hesitated, _would __he __even __be __able __to __hold __her __weight?_ He looked so pale and thin, like he could snap in half at any minute.

"Chell? You can trust me. I'll catch you..."

Chell's eyes widened and her face flushed. Retreating back slightly to hide from him she let out a tiny defiant: "No."

Doug sighed, "Right. I forgot, you can't trust me... Then I'll just stay here and wait for you to come out."

Chell's face flushed with anger. _Why__was__he__doing__this__to__her?_ He was making her feel guilty for distrusting HIM. After he betrayed her! She rolled her eyes and poked her head to look down at him. "Fine," She muttered, before sliding out of the vent and hopping down into his open arms.

He caught her, having to bend his knees slightly to adjust to the impact. He whirled around with Chell still in his arms to face the rest of the room. Chell gasped as she took in the sight...

It was one of his little dens; cleaner than the rest with the same scribbly murals sprawled across the walls. The murals were more complex than his other ones and told the story of Chell gaining her freedom from the facility. She had never seen this one before, and the sight was literally breathtaking.

He was still holding her - bridal style - as she turned to give him a wonderous look. He shrugged, the lopsided, goofy grin reappearing on his face.

"Welcome home, Chell."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>I UPDATED! FINALLY! Took me long enough! D: Anyways, The action is beginning. And don't worry, Chell still isn't very forgiving of what Doug has done. It's gonna cause a lot of drama later on. Anyways, thanks again to my editor, and to valve, and to everyone who reads my fic. I love you all. I'm so glad I found a small niche in this fandom who loves Chellmann just as much as I do! 3


	13. There's a Burning in Your Heart

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Thirteen: There's a Burning in your Heart**

Chell's eyelids fluttered open with the grace of a butterfly stretching it's wings for the first time. A sharp pain coursed through her back and shoulders as she gazed hazily at the sideways mural of her and Wheatley floating in space. She was lying on a makeshift bed of cardboard and potato sacks, unsure of what had just happened.

She sat up, the fuzzy image of the mural straightening itself out and becoming clear again as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. The den was lit softly with the light of artificial sunlight again. The events of the night replaying in her head, she shuddered, feeling the cool, stagnant air of the facility against her bare skin... Wait, bare skin? Chell's eyes widened as she laid eyes on the sleeping form of Doug beside her, also bare.

Head falling into her hands, elbows resting on her knees, Chell replayed the events over and over in her head:

They had decided to stay in the den for awhile, just until GLaDOS came looking for them. Doug had set her down and was now turning on the home made hotplate in the middle of the room, letting it heat up so they could eat something. Cans of food were scattered about; mostly refried beans or tomato soup. Chell hated both with a passion, but after having her knapsack disappear after getting knocked out, beans and soup were the only things they had access to. The heat from the hotplate filled the room instantly, making Chell sigh happily as she admired Doug's paintings.

"I know you're angry and everything, but Cici tells me she can't help but notice you look really cold. Would you like to sit by the hotplate? Maybe I should give back this sweater you gave me..." Doug's voice echoed through the tiny room. Chell turned and politely declined his offer for the sweater.

They ate in silence. Doug only twitching and making squeaking noises every once in awhile. There was a radio in the far corner of the den, but it was turned off. Chell set her can down and pointed at it.

"Tha-that? Just a radio. No-Nothing interesting," His voice was shaky, like he was nervous. Chell wondered why the sudden change.

She stood up and strode over to the little Aperture brand standard radio, scooping it up into her arms and carrying it like a child back to the hotplate. She sat down gingerly and held it out to him, not a word was needed to be said. Doug sighed and took it from her then pressed a button on the top. Instantly music filled the air, the melody floating around them and echoing throughout the den.

Chell listened as each note rang in her ears, the song was unrecognizable. She had never heard it before, but nevertheless it was beautiful; just like the one she had listened to in one of his dens so long ago. She started to hum along, closing her eyes and swaying from side to side with her hands resting gently on her knees.

Doug watched her curiously, he literally had no idea what was going on, but he enjoyed watching the smile that crept across her plump lips as she swayed slowly and in time to the music. She was gorgeous, even with the smear of leftover beans plastered to her cheek. He glanced quickly at his companion cube then stood up, setting the radio down on the surface of the large construct.

She heard him clear his throat. Blue-grey eyes opening wide, she looked up to see he was offering her his hand. Chell was hesitant, but after a moment or two, she slipped her hand into his and let him help pull her to her feet.

It was dark now that the artificial daylight that had filtered in through the vents near the ceiling were shut down. The only light came from the glowing pink hearts on Rattmann's cube, and the eerie red glow that some of the panels seemed to give off when not in use. Still humming along, Chell quickly understood his intentions as he pulled her a little ways away from the still burning hotplate.

They danced. They danced and they danced and they danced. They danced to the ever looping song for hours. They danced until they just couldn't dance anymore. They danced until their feet hurt and they were laughing so hard they could hardly breathe. For once, Chell felt happy. For once, Chell didn't worry. For once, Chell felt safe again.

They fell back onto the makeshift mattress of cardboard and potato sacks, laughing as the song ended and gradually started again. Reaching over, Doug switched the channel on the radio, briefly stopping at the station that played the annoying cheerful song Chell had woken up to the first time she went through testing with GLaDOS. Chell glared at Rattmann before he chuckled and switched it to the station that played the song she had recited to him upon meeting him in the fields.

They leaned back against the wall, arms wrapped lovingly around each other. Chell felt like she should have been on the other side of the room, scowling at him for trying to be so affectionate with her after what he'd done, but she was tired and cold. She just didn't care anymore.

She closed her eyes and leaned her head gently on his shoulder, sighing contently. If it wasn't for the fact that they were trapped hundreds of miles below the earth's surface, Chell would have believed this was just a normal night.

"Chell?" His voice cut through the music, it sounded sad.

"Yes?" She replied curtly.

"I'm sorry."

"I know, you've said that about a million times now."

"No. I'm sorry."

She opened her eyes just as Doug pressed his lips against hers again. The kiss came as a surprise, but she didn't stop him. Threading her fingers through his hair, she pulled him closer, deepening the kiss.

His hands slid down her sides, landing on her hips and gently tugged her closer to him. She could feel the heat rising in her core. It frightened and excited her all at once, she knew what was about to happen. As much as she didn't want it to happen though, primal instinct took over and she rolled on top of him so she was sitting in his lap. Gasping for breath between kisses, she felt like a teenager again: rebellious and carefree. She could feel the heat pass between them and it made her shudder. He hummed against her lips and she felt her body melt. The feeling was new and familiar all at once. She didn't know whether to enjoy it, or push him away.

He groaned against her lips again and she could feel the adrenaline rush through her veins. His grip tightened; his large boney hands easily covering her small back. Chell held his face in her hands as she pulled away to catch her breath, looking down into his mismatched eyes through the stray hair that had fallen into her face. Her face flushed and she turned to look away, _what __was __she __thinking?_

Suddenly she found herself where Doug had been only seconds ago. Her back flat on the ground, she glanced up to see Doug had rolled on top of her. The tables turned. A coy smile had spread across his lips and he stared down at her with a look that said he knew; he understood her carnal desires. She flushed a brighter colour and began to sit up but he stopped her by pinning her to the makeshift mattress and planted tiny kisses along her jawline and neck.

She laughed, the kisses tickled and she couldn't help but try to squirm and wiggle her way out of his grasp, but he was too strong. _So __strong __for __such __a __frail __looking __body._

He paused, breathing softly onto the skin of her neck and whispered gently into her ear, "We don't need to do this. Just tell me to stop and I will."

She shut her eyes tightly and shook her head, "No. It's okay."

It was not okay. She had specifically told herself NOT to get involved with him. She had made herself promise not to end up doing this. But here she was, lying flat on her back with the man who had saved her and betrayed her leaning over her. What was worse was the heated feeling that was building up inside her. She turned her head to the side and shut her eyes tightly, waiting for him to continue.

He ran his fingers through the loose hair around her face and tugged gently at the hair-tie holding her hair in its almost natural place at the back of her head. The tie slid out easily and her long, dark hair fell in soft waves around her neck and shoulders. Chell cracked one eye open and gave him a questioning glare.

"You look better with your hair down," He explained.

_When __had __he __seen __her __with __her __hair __down? _Chell smiled bashfully and, wrapping her arms around his neck, brought him closer so she could kiss him again.

It didn't take long after that for the both of them to strip down. Chell was the first to take off her shirt. The heat passing between them had made her feel overheated, and she felt the only way to fix it was to get as bare as possible. _That __was __a __mistake._

She lay on the cardboard, heavy breaths passing between them as they broke from their embrace. She was embarrassed to be so exposed in front of someone. Especially him. But he too had stripped, and she could see he didn't take a liking to being so vulnerable either. His face was flushed slightly and he avoided her eyes. His body was thin, pale and lanky. While her body was toned, thick and curvy. The contrast between them was almost laughable.

"Are you ready?" He whispered to her through the dark. She spread her legs and nodded, trying her hardest not to show the excitement on her face. She couldn't contain herself anymore, she was so full of passion and desire at this point she didn't care, let alone worry anymore.

Doug nodded and pushed, thrusting into her. Chell gasped and dug her nails into the skin of his back. Pain. _Why __was __it __so __painful?_ Then again, it had been quite a long time since she'd last done this sort of thing with anyone. She bit her lip and clenched her eyes shut, but he stopped.

"I'm hurting you, aren't I? I'll stop," His voice was panicked, shaky. He started to pull away, but she clamped her thighs around his waist and pulled him back into her. Another gasp escaped her lips and she smiled, her silent way of letting him know it was okay.

He let out a small moan and began slowly thrusting, pushing deeper inside her. She panted, the feeling of him filling her made her toes curl and she let out a whimper of pleasure. He kept going, increasing speed steadily. He grunted and groaned against the force of her and she lifted her hips, giving him better access.

Chell let out tiny whimpers and yelps of pleasure as he continued to rock back and forth into her. She felt a euphoric feeling rise up through her as he increased speed again. She began rocking her hips involuntarily against his. Her body was moving on its own, like it knew exactly what to do to make her feel good, and make him feel good as well.

Doug was biting his lower lip, suppressing a loud groan that was forming in his throat. Chell could tell he didn't want to make noise. Whether it was for fear of GLaDOS finding them, or if he just really liked listening to her pant and moan, Chell couldn't say. It didn't matter though, he seemed to be enjoying himself, his hand reaching up to cup one of her breasts. She panted softly and let her hands fall to her sides before reaching up, giving him a better view.

A smile played across his lips before he leaned down, still thrusting against her, and laid playful kisses along her collarbone and chest. That sent her over the edge. Chell's legs wrapped themselves around his waist and she let out a raspy "Ohhh!" Her back arched and she threw her head back, eyes rolling as she felt a rush of the incredible feeling flood her core.

He finally let out the groan he had been holding back, the noise escaping him loud and sweet. Chell felt her whole body shake as she felt the climax near and she smiled, wide and proud, before smashing her lips against his.

She moaned against his lips as it came; the overpowering sensation of passion and pleasure. Her whole body twitched as the sensation washed over her, filling her up to the brim with the euphoric feeling. She could feel he was just about ready to burst as well, and she clenched her legs tighter around his waist as he gasped, exploding with pleasure. When he was finished, he collapsed into her, face buried into her neck as he panted, trying hard to catch his breath. She too was out of breath, but the after feeling was absolutely tremendous.

They lied there, huffing and panting away in the dark for a good half an hour afterwards. It wasn't long before Chell realized Doug had fallen asleep in her arms. She gently pushed him, rolling him over onto the stretch of cardboard beside her, grimacing at the weird, uncomfortable feeling she got as he slid out of her. He immediately curled into a sort of fetal position and she smiled, watching his sleeping figure through the pitch black. Slowly her eyelids got heavier, and eventually she drifted off into a peaceful sleep, wrapped lovingly in his arms. The soft melody of their song still playing quietly as they slept.

~x~

The song was still playing as Chell stood up and got dressed, using a rag she found to clean the dried remains of last night's festivities from her thighs. She glanced over at the sleeping form of Rattmann again and sighed softly. _What__was__she__thinking?_ He was in no way a well enough mental state to have done what they had. He was crazy; a mental case who had lived underground for who knows how long.

Chell tip-toed over to his sleeping figure and draped his old lab coat over him. She smiled sadly down at him and whispered a quick apology for what she was about to do.

Turning on her heel, she walked swiftly over to the vent they had come into from. With a quick, saddened glance back at Doug, Chell hopped up, and pulled herself into the vent, disappearing from view.

She knew she'd regret it soon, but she couldn't stand to be in the same room knowing what they had done together. The thought disgusted her and not because it was _him_, but because she had broken a promise to herself. Chell had always been one to stick to promises. She'd always been too stubborn to break a promise.

Half an hour later she was back on the catwalks of the relaxation centre. Guilt was filling her every living cell as she pushed forward. The voices of regret and guilt filling her mind and taking over. Chell bit her lip and started to run along the catwalks, her boots causing a loud tinging noise as they came into contact with the metal.

But the farther away from the vent she got, the louder and more intense the voices in her head told her to turn around. Screaming and clutching her temples Chell fell to her knees, sniffly sobs leaving her lips as she began to cry. She had no idea why, she just knew she need to cry.

It seemed like an hour had gone by when Doug found her lying on the catwalk, tears still glistening in the corners of her eyes. He knelt down beside her and took her face in his hands. A weak smile stretched his lips and he kissed her forehead gently. Chell sat up and threw her arms around him, sobbing into the collar of his wrinkled dress shirt.

"I don't know what I would do without you," She managed to say through erratic sobbing.

"I don't know either. But what I do know is that I love you, and we're gonna make it out of here. Just you watch..."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>And now you all know why I had to switch the rating. haha. Welp, you're either going to hate me now, or love me because of this chapter. I hope its the latter. Anyways this was my first shot at smut, so um. I'm sorry if it's shitty. Anyways, thanks again to my editor and to all my readers! 3 Waiting on the next chapter!


	14. There is a Light that Never Goes Out

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Fourteen: There is a Light that Never Goes Out.**

Doug Rattmann liked going to work. As much as he hated his job, there was one thing he loved about Aperture Laboratories.

Most of his co-workers weren't very friendly. He knew they spoke about him, whispering and muttering about him behind his back. Sometimes he'd catch them, their eyes avoiding his as he asked them what they were talking about. They'd shuffle awkwardly, nervously even, as he give them questioning looks. They always lied and said something involving science, Doug knew they weren't though.

There were a few people that treated Doug normally though and one of those people was Caroline. Caroline was the delightful, enthusiastic assistant to Cave Johnson, and she was a beauty too. Although he rarely got to speak with her, Doug always thought of her as a kind and gentle woman. From the way she spoke, she was rather innocent as well. Everything about her was... perfect.

"How has your day been so far, Doug?" She'd ask, small wrinkles forming around her mouth as she smiled. Her eyes would close and she'd tip her head to one side as her long brown hair fell into her face.

Doug would look up and smile, nodding softly before saying, "Same as always. How have you been?"

Today was different though. Caroline had come round to check up on their department, just as usual, but as she stopped beside Doug she placed a small slip of paper on his desk. Then, before he could even look up, she turned swiftly on her heel and left the room. Not a word was said. Doug blinked, staring blankly at the doorway she'd just left, before turning his attention to the paper.

Reaching down, ignoring the strange looks of Henry and the other scientists in the room, Doug swooped up the paper and unfolded it slowly. He was about to start reading it when someone gave him a hard, jarring slap to the back, making him jump in his seat and crinkle the note in his fists.

"Whatchya got there Dougie? A love note? ohhhh Let's see!" A face appeared over his shoulder, leering and curious. It was Matthew, another scientist from their department that loved to annoy Doug about anything and everything. But his favourite thing to tease him about was Caroline.

"You were too chicken to ask her out, so she had to ask you out, is that it?"

"It's nothing Matt. It's probably just a form she wants me to fill out," Doug sighed.

"You leave Rattmann alone, Jensen. You should be working on that report Johnson wants done in an hour!" It was Henry, one of the only other people to stand up for Doug.

"I'm almost finished! Can't I have a little fun around here?" Matt complained, returning to his seat across the room. Doug gave Henry a quick smile; his was of thanking him for his intrusion.

Doug then waited for everyone to return to their work before he smoothed out the paper and began reading what it said. His eyes scanned the paper, soaking in the information Caroline's elegant handwriting had left for him. His eyes widened slightly, and he immediately ripped up the paper, shredding it into a million tiny pieces before dumping it all in his wastebasket.

At lunch, Doug slipped out of the cafeteria and away from his co-workers as they jittered on about their families and lives (something he really had nothing to contribute to usually, as he had no family and knew very well no one was interested in his artistic hobbies), heading down a long catwalk towards the main office sector. He shyly waved to a few people as he passed by, then quickly slid into the dimly lit hallways that lead to the various offices that controlled Aperture. Blinking, he tried to remember where Caroline's office was. He remembered being ushered into her office when he was first interviewed for the job position at Aperture, nervous beyond belief that they'd dismiss him the minute they found out about his schizophrenia, only to be greeted with a cheerful, warm smile and the sweet, soft sound of Caroline's voice. Remembering, he jogged his way up three flights of stairs and smiled as he reached her door.

Knocking lightly, Doug waited until the soft voice, muffled by the door, welcomed him into the room. Opening the door and peering into the room, he saw Caroline sitting at her desk, the skyscraper pile of paperwork that seemed to never go away looming over her as she smiled weakly up at him. "Y-you asked me to see you, Caroline. Wh-what's this about something urgent?"

Caroline pointed to a seat across from her and said softly, "Yes, thank you for coming Doug. Have a seat."

"Is there something wrong? Am I in trouble?" Doug asked, he wasn't really worried about losing his job, he hated it after all, but he knew he should at least act worried.

"You're fine Doug. It... It's me. I've... I've been asked by Mr. Johnson to do something very drastic for science and... well. I'm not sure if I should," Her eyes creased as her forehead wrinkled into deep set worry lines. Her brown eyes filled with fear.

"What is it?" He was curious now, leaning forward in his seat, palms pressed firmly against the edge of her desk.

"Mr. Johnson's been ill for quite some time, as you must know, but lately he's been getting worse..." Caroline stared sadly at her hands, folded neatly on the smooth surface of her desk, "But lately he's been talking about how he won't be alive in time for us to build a computer to put his conscious into."

Doug knew where this was going, and he didn't want to hear it. He and his co-workers had spent the last year and a half up to their asses trying to design a working AI for Johnson, and he wasn't about to lose Caroline to it.

"NO!" Doug shouted, standing up and slamming a fist against the desk. "You shouldn't have to do anything he says! You don't deserve to-"

"Doug."

Her voice was calm and sweet, and he knew she was serious by the way she stared at him defiantly.

"Mr. Johnson trusts me to keep this place running when he's gone. If that means giving up my life for science then so be it."

Doug stared down into her lovely brown eyes, now ridden with fear and a strange defiance - no, tenacity. She had made up her mind and she was telling him this because... Because she trusted him. He lowered back down into his seat, his mismatched eyes lowering to gaze down at his feet. "You're not even gonna put up a fight, are you?"

"I'm going to try not to. But the way the AI project is going right now, I don't think we'll have to worry about anything happening for quite a while."

She was right. She was always right. It had been a good five years before they had to worry. Five years. Doug was thirty two when the announcement had been made that the Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System was complete, and all that needed to be done was upload Caroline's conscious onto it.

Doug Rattmann hated his job. As he watched Caroline being dragged off towards the operating room, kicking and screaming, he felt guilty and sad. He wished he could have told her what she meant to him. He wished he had let her know how much he loved her. It wasn't until he heard the blood curdling screams coming from the operating room that he realized he was too late. Not knowing what else to do, Doug turned and ran.

~x~

_Get __up. __She__'__s __gone._

Doug's eyes shot open and he realized exactly where he was. Pushing himself up off the cardboard mattress, he almost fell back again as his whole body ached. Squinting through the artificial sunlight, Doug noticed he was alone.

_She __left._

"Where did she go?" He asked, turning to glare at the cube.

_How __would __I __know? __She __just __got __up, __got __dressed __and __left._

Doug reached over and shut the radio off, he was getting a headache and he knew noise would only make it worse. He then looked down into his lap and blushed, remembering exactly what had happened the night before.

_What ever __happened __to__ "__I__'__d __never __think __of __doing __that __with __her__"__?_

Doug didn't answer, instead, he scooped up his clothing and dressed himself half-hazardly, pacing about the large den in thought. "Where could she have gone? Why did she leave? She doesn't know these parts of the facility well enough! What if she gets lost?"

_You __sound __like __an __overprotective __father._

"I care about her."

_You __love __her._

"I..." Doug was at a lose for words.

_You __do, __don__'__t __you?_

Caroline. Instantly he thought of Caroline. They were similar in so many ways. Both were tenacious and stubborn. Both were sweet and kind.

_Caroline __is __dead, __Doug. __Don__'__t __let __Chell __get __away, __or __you __might __have __to __relive __that __experience __all __over __again._

Doug turned to give the cube a desperate look, he could see his reflection in the silvery metal of Cici's steel plates. He looked so _old._That thought alone made him feel even more helpless and lost. He looked away, he couldn't stand his reflection anymore. This was ridiculous.

_ She shouldn't be far. She left about an hour ago. If we leave now, there's a chance she might still be nearby._

Doug's eyes widened. All hope had not been lost. He could fix this. He could tell her he was sorry. He _knew_ he shouldn't have kissed her last night. Glancing at Cici, then to the open vent they had arrived from, it took only a matter of mere seconds for Doug to scoop Cici up and clamber into the vent.

Doug searched the catwalks for an hour and a half. He was starting to lose hope of finding her when he noticed a languid form off in the distance. Curious, he inched his way closer, making out the shape of Chell's slender, athletic body. His first thought was that she was hurt - or worse, dead. He rushed over and crouched beside her, the worry washing away from his face, replaced with relief, as she looked up at him with those sad grey eyes.

_She __can__'__t __do __it __without __you. __She__'__s __too __attached._

Doug bent down, pressing his lips against her forehead softly, his thumbs swiping gently across her eyes, wiping away the salty tears that had formed there.

"I don't know what I would do without you," she whispered into his neck after sitting up and throwing her arms around him in a tight hug. Doug smiled, it felt like he should be the one saying that, but that didn't matter right now. What mattered was she was safe, she was alive, she was here, with him.

"I don't know either. But what I do know is that I love you and we're gonna make it out of here alive. Just you watch..." Doug whispered back.

They stayed there for quite a while, holding each other until Chell seemed to stop crying. She sniffled, pulling away from him and looking down at her lap with shame.

"I'm sorry. I know I've said that to the point that it's meaningless now, but I really am. One day, Chell, you won't have to worry. You won't have to deal with Aperture or turrets, or testing or any of this. One day you'll forget this all happened. I promise that when we get out of here, I'll take you as far away from here as possible. We'll never have to see this place again," He had no idea if this was ever going to happen and he sure as hell didn't know why he was so sincere and sane-sounding. He helped her up and gave her a quick, tight hug.

"Doug?" Her voice was scratchy and soft and muffled against his shoulder.

"Yes?"

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

Doug was silent. But it was true, he wasn't sure if he could keep that promise or not. He looked down to see her smiling slyly up at him. A coy grin pulled at his lips and her ruffled her hair.

"C'mon. Let's go. GLaDOS is probably looking for us..." He muttered, intwining his fingers with hers. He gave her another kiss on the forehead and they started down the catwalk again.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>It's been awhile! But It's finally here! Sorry for such a long wait, I've been going mad with school work. I'm on winter holidays now so I'll be writing up a storm! Thanks again to my editor and all my readers! I'd like to ask if anyone has any music suggestions for Troubled Minds? I'm compiling a fanmix. Just message me or hit up my tumblr (check my profile).


	15. The Chase

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Fifteen: The Chase**

Running. That's all he ever did. And now he was doing it again, only this time, he had more than his own life to save. Doug's heart pounded against his chest as he sprinted, pulling Chell along with him. Frantically looking around him, he tried to map out the best possible route to get them to safety. They didn't have much time.

_Turn__left.__There__are__turrets__stationed__to__the__right._ The companion cube attached to his back whispered.

Chell had no idea what was going on, one moment, they were sitting on the catwalks, sharing a moment, the next, they were running for their lives. The announcer had come on. "Please assume the party escort position and wait for the party escort bot," it claimed, the cheerful demeanor to it's voice almost mocking them. But that's the thing about Aperture, you never knew what was going to happen next, and you could never count on anything good lasting more than a moment.

Doug's eyes had widened as he heard the announcement. "Run!" He had demanded, clutching her hand so tightly she lost feeling in it. They began running, as fast as they could, all the while Doug was hastily whispering to his cube, asking for directions and help.

Chell tugged at his sleeve, pointing to an open panel on the other side of the passageway they were now traversing. Doug took one glance at it and immediately headed toward it.

_Don__'__t__go__in__there!__She__has__a__trap__set__up__for__you!_

Doug pulled away from the open panel and began his sprint in the opposite direction, but was stopped when Chell wouldn't budge, causing him be yanked back towards the panel.

"It's a trap. We need to figure out a different way out," He tried to reason with the brunette woman but she shook her head and refused to go with him.

_Stubborn.__Just__like__her__file__says...__Tell__her__you__know__the__way__out._

"I know the way out of here, it's not through there, trust me."

"She wants us to test, doesn't she?" Chell asked defiantly.

Doug blinked down at her, confused for a moment. "Well, yes, but I thought you wanted out of here?"

"I do."

"Then let's go."

"No."

Doug let out an exasperated sigh. Tenacity was great when it didn't involve having to deal with it face to face. He pinched the bridge of his nose between his thumb and pointer finger, his eyes scrunching closed as he tried his hardest not to yell.

"We need to get out of here, Chell. What purpose do you have for staying here?"

Chell stayed quiet. She wasn't exactly sure why she wanted to stay here, but she had a hunch she needed to go through the open panel, and she wasn't going to go anywhere without Doug beside her. She stared defiantly up at him, her eyes almost glowing with a mixture of pride and determination. Her brow furrowed, knitting together in the middle as her most stoic, determined face revealed itself to him. A plan was already forming in the clever brain of hers.

The announcer broke through again, "Please assume the party escort position. A Party Escort bot will be arriving shortly to take you to the correct test chamber."

Doug sighed, if this is how she wanted it, then fine, he'd just have to figure out a way to get themselves out of there when She did trap them. He straightened himself out and curled his hand around Chell's. "Go on, lead the way."

Chell smiled and they began running again. Doug gulped as they entered the little passageway and started towards what looked like a pure white test chamber. Chell squeezed his hand gently, a sign that said "it's alright, I'm here," and slowed to a quick walking pace, entering the blinding white room. Shielding his eyes from the sheer brilliance of the light reflected on the white surfaces of the test chamber, Doug gasped.

In the center of the room, a large pit filled with toxic sludge sat, bubbling quietly. In the middle of the pit, a pedestal stood, holding two Aperture Science handheld Portal devices. But that wasn't the worst part of the room.

All around them, thin red lasers pointed at them, aiming for their heads and other exposed areas of their bodies. Chell and Doug looked on as hundreds of Turrets aimed for them, their creepy, auto-tuned voices filling the air as they readied to attack.

"We're as good as dead," Doug whispered.

"No," Chell whispered back, "We're just getting started."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Short Chapter is Short. Anyways, if you have any music suggestions for the fanmix, just tell me okay? Awesome! Happy Reading guys!


	16. Does It Feel Like a Trial?

Troubled Minds

**Chapter Sixteen: Does it feel like a Trial?**

Doug's heart stopped. Eyes widening and hands shaking, Doug watched as the hole in the wall they had just emerged from closed, sealed shut.

"We need to get out of here now. We're gonna die. We're gonna die!" He shouted, his voice straining to get louder.

"Hello!"

"Target acquired!"

"I see you!"

The tiny voices of the turrets rang out, their lasers crossing each other's as they all aimed straight for Chell and Doug. He clutched at her hand, truly afraid of dying. Who would want to die this way? He could feel her pulse quickening underneath her skin.

_They aren't shooting... That's strange. But then again, you are the one who let the lunatic here lead you into this death trap. They've probably all malfunctioned due to shock at how stupid you two are,_ The cube teased. Doug had enough of this bullshit, he knew damn well why they weren't shooting. _She_ hadn't given the command yet. The turrets were her little pawns, waiting their turn to do as they were told.

Chell's heart was pounding, but she tried her hardest not to show any worry on her face. She stared fixedly on the portal guns in the center of the toxic pit. Her mind was working in overdrive, figuring out a way to get to them without getting killed. It wasn't until Doug had tightly grasped her wrist that she realized the turrets hadn't shot them yet. That was strange...

_"I really didn't think you two would fall for that. I've been looking all over for you. Where have you been?" _Her voice was dripping with sarcasm as it filled the large chamber. _"It's such a shame you couldn't start the tests sooner. To be completely honest though, that lewd act you did earlier sort of made up for the tests I had planned."_

She knew. She knew what they had done and it sent shivers down his spine. Doug felt himself blush and covered his stubbly face with his free hand. Chell's eyes had widened and she glanced down bashfully at her feet.

_"You might not have realized this but I now have full access to the entire facility. That includes your little love nests, Rat."_

Doug wanted to scream. How did this happen? How? He opened his mouth, ready to speak, but She cut him off, _"While you were on the surface trying to seduce the lunatic into coming back, the cooperative testing initiative found some very, VERY, important files that you humans carelessly left around."_

"Then you have access to... Oh god what have I done?" Doug cried, panic overwhelming him. He let go of Chell's wrist and began pacing around, hands flying up to clutch at his temples.

Chell watched him, a confused look on her face. She had no idea what was going on. But GLaDOS' sudden reply seemed to explain it all, _"Yes. This was all just a trick. Just a simple little trick to get you and her together so I could get rid of you both. I never needed you. I have plenty of test subjects in stasis right now..."_

Chell's head whipped around to stare at Doug, shock sweeping over her features. She had thought Doug had set her up, but the reality was they were both set up. Searing anger rushed through Chell's body as she realized she should have known GLaDOS would do something so cruel.

_"I don't want you two running off and telling anyone about this, so I have to do this. It's too bad too, I really did believe you were my friend... Che- BZZT- ell,"_ Her voice cracked and static sounded as GLaDOS pronounced Chell's name. _"I'll make you a deal though; you two test for me, and I'll let you live here. You don't want to test, well... We'll just have to have another Bring Your Daughter To Work Day now, won't we?"_

So there it was. Test or die. Test or die? Chell literally had no choice in the matter. Doug on the other hand, was starting to like the latter option. He had always been cowardly and dying would only prove his cowardliness. He glanced down at Chell sheepishly and started to back away. There was no place to go, but he'd rather die propped up against a wall than splayed out in a mess on the floor. This had been all his fault, it would just be better if he was dead anyways. Everything he did seemed to go wro-

Chell's hand wrapped itself tenderly around his, grasping firmly but gently. Doug stared fixedly on their hands for a second, before following the slender form of her wrist and arm up to her face. Her eyes, the prettiest shade of blue-grey he'd ever seen, were wide and staring intensely at him. Her thin dark eyebrows arched up in the middle, creating perfect little worry lines across her forehead. A hint of a smile played upon her plump lips. Reassuring. Doug couldn't help but feel she was talking to him. Even if her lips hadn't opened.

It was a sad smile. One that he could have sworn he'd seen on her face as he watched the party escort bot drag her back into the facility long ago. It was one that said, "It's gonna be okay. One day, we'll be happy again." It broke his heart.

Chell knew he was scared, she knew he didn't want to face the horrors that awaited them. But she knew if they could just survive for a little while longer, they'd find a way out. She had always been riddled with a sort of sucker's luck and if it had worked for her the first two times, she hoped it would work for them this time.

Doug stayed quiet for a moment before looking up into the hidden cameras, proudly. He cleared his throat and smiled nervously, "Fine. We'll test. But we're not promising anything." He took one look at Chell to see she was also staring up at the ceiling, a defiant smile sharing the space of her face with her ever intensely determined eyes.

_"Very well then. But we won't have to worry. After what I'm going to put you two through, you'll be begging for death..."_ GLaDOS' voice rang out, malevolent and sadistic as always.

A loud **bleep bloop** was heard and suddenly every single turrets' optic went dead. A minute past and a large catwalk structure made from glass and acid resistant metal rose from the toxic sludge, giving the test subjects a clear path to the portal devices. Chell and Doug took one look at one another, Doug laughing nervously under his breath. Chell flashed a reassuring smile, like the one before, and gave his hand a tiny squeeze before tugging him along the catwalk towards the devices.

Chell paused, letting go of Doug's hand and hovering her own above one of the portal devices. Her suspicious instincts kicked in and for a moment she thought this might all just be another trap, another way for GLaDOS to get what she'd wanted since the very beginning.

But GLaDOS' voice cutting through the ambient silence again woke Chell from her thoughts, _"Subject Douglas Rattmann is first to retrieve Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device."_

Chell looked up to see Doug was already aiming his portal gun at the wall opposite them. She quickly grabbed the other portal gun and heard GLaDOS' annoyingly cold voice state, _"Subject Chell [REDACTED] has retrieved Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device."_

Chell was unsure whether or not she liked the use of her name being announced out like that. Before GLaDOS would have just insulted her, but the use of Chell's name made shivers run down her spine. The fear of uncertainty and - dare she think it - _closeness_ to the murderous A.I made Chell cringe. She shot a portal where Doug had his device aimed at and another portal on the wall behind them, trying desperately to shake off the weird vibes she was getting from GLaDOS' newfound love of her name.

Doug stood frozen. As much as he wanted to, he knew damn well Chell wouldn't want to just give up now. He stared blankly at the portal she had just produced. He could see his backside through the portal. He wasn't exceptionally tall, but he was about a head taller than Chell. The way he hunched over - cube secured tightly on his back - though made him look old and small, frail. From behind, he looked to be about 60 years old, hunched as if he'd worked his entire life bent over. Chell nudged him, not a word from her lips as she pointed to the portal behind them. He knew she wouldn't dare speak until they were alone, which by the sounds of it, would be never again. He instantly started to miss the soothing, sultry tone of her voice, he had gotten so used to hearing it every so often and now she had instantaneously returned to her stoic mutism. It scared the living shit out of him.

Chell had begun walking. There were a million things bolting through her mind at the moment. She had been so stupid, so naive, so - dare she admit it - moronic. It _was _something Wheatley would have done, willingly fall into GLaDOS' perfect little trap like she had. She mentally scolded herself for ever trusting herself like that. Chell stood in front of the portal and her stoic, determined stubbornness returned almost instantly. She'd get through these tests, she'd push herself to her limits again, she'd fight for what she deserved: Freedom.

Without another thought, using her free hand stretched out in front of her, Chell pushed through the invisible barrier and emerged out on the other side of the room. She turned and stuck her free hand back through, holding it out for Doug. She watched him with cold, indifferent eyes. She watched him rock nervously from side to side, deciding whether or not to actually move from his designated spot or not. After a few seconds delay, he seemed to realize she was waiting for him and he jumped, scrambling over to meet with her.

~x~

"I think I can get us out of this without having to shut the emancipation grill down. She won't like that at all," Doug reasoned, apparently more to his companion cube rather than Chell. Chell shot it a quick look of jealousy (or was it annoyance, he couldn't tell) before rolling her eyes and leaning against the ebony black panels that lined the walls towards the test's exit.

_Doug, you have to leave me behind. Face it, you don't need me anymore,_ Cici sighed, hypothetically.

"No! You're going to see sunlight again. Just like I promised Chell would again!" The sound of Doug's voice, uncharacteristically loud and booming, echoed through the small corridor to the elevator. It made Chell jump a foot into the air. "Sorry, didn't mean to frighten you Chell," He added.

They had been here for at least 20 minutes. After they had completed the test, GLaDOS had opened the exit hatch for them and they had walked a short distance to an emancipation grill. Doug and Chell both knew very well that cubes disintegrated the moment they touched the blue, shiny static wall.

"There's got to be a way to temporarily shut them off," Doug muttered, studying the panels surrounding the grill. Chell was getting anxious, staying in one place in Aperture meant one of two things; either you were waiting to be killed or you were open, exposed, She could find you and kill you with a single command. _Neurotoxin Online..._

Doug didn't seem to realize that though. He was too immersed in his own little world, tinkering away with the emancipation grill to realize they could die at any given moment. Chell both admired and hated it. How could someone be so oblivious and still be living right now?

Or perhaps this was a dream? A terrible, terrible dream that she'd awake from in the morning and find herself alone again in her tiny apartment in the complex. Or maybe she was still in stasis. Maybe she was still slumbering away for god knows how long and this, all this, the complex, Wheatley, Doug, everything she'd ever experienced since the last time she was in Aperture was all just a dream. Maybe Doug was someone she had created to fill the romantic void in her life and Michelle had been created by her mind to fill the role of a motherly figure; caring and talking to her, being there for her when she needed someone the most. Perhaps Chell was already dead and this, all of this, was someone's sick idea of heaven and hell and purgatory all mashed up into one never ending nightmare that she'd never awake from.

Or perhaps Chell was over thinking again.

Doug jumped up, laughing and throwing his hands up in triumph. The noise made Chell jump, shaken from her thoughts as she turned to see the smile spreading almost ear to ear across his face. "I think I did it!, I programmed it to recognize Cici. Hopefully it'll work!"

Chell smiled in response, happy they'd be moving again. She pushed off the panel she was leaning against and passed through the emancipation grill, the portal device jerking slightly in her hands. She turned and waited for Doug, a million thoughts still running through her head. As _close_ as they had gotten in the last few hours, Chell's instincts told her to keep her guard up around him. She still didn't know if she could trust him. Which seemed rather silly, but instincts were instincts, and in Aperture sometimes instincts were the best way to go.

Doug was a little cautious still, but he slowly inched his way through the blue static and onto the other side where Chell was. He instantly regretted it though as he heard the familiar twang-fizzle of an unauthorized object moving through the wall of static. He watched as Chell's eyes widened and she stepped back slowly, frightened of what his reaction might be.

In a swift, panicked motion, Doug spun around to catch a glimpse at the cube floating softly through the grill. It was slowly fading to a deep black colour, and Doug forced himself to tear his eyes away from the sight when the cube started to disintegrate. Instead he focused his attention on Chell who stood a few feet away, emotionless.

The sudden realization of what just happened kicked in and Doug instantly fell to his knees, dropping the portal gun and slamming his fists into the floor beneath him. He let out a moan, not like one of the moans he'd shared with Chell during their moment of intense passion, this moan was full of hurt, of pain and suffering, of pure despair.

Chell gasped, and shuffled back a little further. She had never had to deal with something like this before. She had always been the one to suffer, to break down and need someone to lean against and even then she rarely did so. But now, here and now, the roles had been switched, the tables turned and she had no idea what to do. She watched as Doug buried his head in his hands, his eyes scrunching up as he fought back tears. Chell had never seen a full grown man cry before, the sight was oddly fascinating.

A few moments past in complete silence, save for the low, quiet hum of the facility and Doug's barely audible gasps for breath as he sobbed. Chell felt strange, awkwardly standing at the entrance to the elevator shaft as she watched him. She had no idea what to do though and his sobbing was starting to get louder. She knew she had to do something and she was getting more and more impatient as time wore on.

It was in that instant that she realized how selfish she had been. For years she thought she was the only surviving victim of GLaDOS' reign of terror, when in reality, Doug had been suffering for much, much longer, even if he denied it. He had helped her, kept an eye on her and worshipped her in a way that saved her life. She owed everything to him and here she was, pitying the poor, helpless man.

Thud.

Doug heard the noise but didn't look up. A moment later Chell was kneeling beside him, her arms snaking their way around his waist and her face burrowing into his shoulder. His breath hitched in his throat and he realized what she was doing; she was comforting him. She was telling him it was going to be alright, that everything would get better real soon. And even if that might not have been the case, that's how it felt. And who was he to deny that?

The problem, he seemed to notice, was that she was rather rigid. Cold and impatient. It was almost as if she was comforting him in order to get on with it. Like a frustrated woman, upset and embarrassed with her crying child's behavior in public, comforting him only to get him to keep going. He could feel the annoyed vibes emanating from her warm skin. She was upset, she still hated him for what he had done. No matter what he did, she would never forgive him. He knew deep down, she'd always hold that grudge.

Just as fast as she had wrapped her arms around him, they were gone and she was waltzing back towards the elevator, scooping up the portal gun as she went. Something was different about her, her mood changed so fast. Doug marveled at it, confused and bewildered. He scratched his head, wiping the tears from his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater and scrambling to catch up.

~x~

She didn't say a word through the next few chambers. Chell didn't either. He didn't know if it was out of respect for him or if she was just annoyed with her surroundings again. In order to keep his mind off of the death of his cube, Doug wondered if maybe there was technical trouble with the speakers in the chambers that were blocking the loud, venomous voice from reaching them. But then he remembered there couldn't be. If something was broken or having technical difficulties, She would have known right away and would have it fixed in a blink of an eye. That was the marvelous aspect of GLaDOS; she processed and performed actions at lightning speeds. It almost made him proud to have known that some of his coding - some of his hard work - had been used to help Her achieve that sort of processing. He shook that feeling away quickly though, not wanting to be reminded of the past anymore.

_"It looks like you've been busy. Besides trying to reproduce like rabbits, you two have made excellent progress through these last few tests. I would congratulate you on your hard work but you haven't even hit the half-way point yet. Not that there actually is a half-way point. You're here for eternity remember?"_

Chell's nails started to dig into her palms. She would not let the massive AI have the benefit of seeing a reaction. Her face was strangely calm, but if you looked closely, you could see her jaw was set, teeth clenched, stare almost as intense as Doug's had been the first they met in the field. She did _not_ like being constantly reminded of the lewd act they had performed earlier. She wanted to rid her mind of it, regretting it instantly. She was so ashamed of herself.

And here she was, listening to Her babble on and on about how they had "soiled her precious facility" with their actions. Chell was livid with anger; not only at GLaDOS, but at herself for falling. For giving in to temptation. For acting so completely _not_ herself, even for just that one moment.

With a defiant stare straight into the glowing red eye of the camera, Chell's plump lips parted and she growled, "Shut up!"

Doug's eyes widened and he took a step back. Silence hung thick in the air and he knew, he _knew_, this would not end well.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> This one's really long and I'm so sorry for that. Anyways, This is a belated xmas/holiday post and an early new years post! Happy holidays everyone! And if you have any suggestions for the fanmix, send em my way!


	17. Fear of Dying

Troubled Minds

**Chapter 17: Fear of Dying**

Chell was exhausted. The supply of adrenal vapor made sure she was able to keep going, but that wasn't what she was exhausted about.

No, Chell had become mentally and emotionally exhausted. So much had happened within the past while that had played with her emotions. She leaned against the dark panels leading to another one of GLaDOS' stupid elevator shafts that would lead them to another one of Her stupid tests. Letting out an exasperated sigh, she slid down to the floor and held her head in her hands.

How long had it been since she'd last seen the light of day? It had to be only two or three days ago. But in Aperture an hour felt like one year and there was no telling how much time had passed. Chell sighed again and looked up at Doug, who was quiet, save for the few twitchy sounds he released every once in awhile. He had grown quieter and quieter since the "death" of his cube.

GLaDOS hadn't liked Chell's little demanding outburst. That was for sure. Chell and Doug had dodged many turrets after that. But Chell was proud of herself, she hadn't said a word since and she could tell GLaDOS was getting more and more frustrated with the fact that she hadn't spoken since.

GLaDOS had tried so hard to get her to keep reacting, to keep the hate flowing through her, but Chell knew better. She continued on through the tests like she had before; with the same intense determination and tenacity as before. GLaDOS taunting and teasing her, trying her hardest to coax the voice out of the brunette.

"Chell," She looked up to see Doug staring at her.

"What?" She spat, the anger in her voice rising.

Doug stayed quiet. He wasn't quite sure of how to respond to that. He blinked and turned away, muttering something under his breath.

"You know what? You can go fuck yourself!" Chell snapped, standing up and walking through the emancipation grill.

"What? What do you mean by that?" He sounded hurt.

"This is all your fault Doug. You tricked me into coming back here and then she decides to keep us as her little pets."

Doug sighed, "Right. And I apologized about that. I promised I'd get us out of here, didn't I?"

"Yeah well it's not like you've gotten us anywhere!"

"I'M TRYING, CHELL!" He yelled.

Her eyes widened and she flinched. His voice echoed through the tiny hallway, booming over the ambient sound of the facility. She had never thought he'd be one to yell, and frankly, neither did he. They stared at each other for a long moment, a look of sheer terror in her eyes. Doug reached out towards her, apologetic expression dominating his face, but she turned and ran.

~x~

She was waiting for the elevator when he caught up to her. Doubling over in order to catch his breath, Doug reached out and grasped her shoulder gently. "Chell... I... I didn't... mean to yell at you... like that," he panted.

She shrugged his hand off her shoulder and got into the elevator. He followed her, but the angry look she gave him told him to do otherwise.

"Look I-" He was interrupted by a loud smacking sound and his vision blurring.

It wasn't until his vision cleared that he realized Chell had punched him, right square in the face. He felt something watery and warm run down his stubbly chin and when he reached up to touch it, he realized she had split his lip and it was now bleeding profusely.

"Don't talk to me. From now on we're just gonna do these damn tests and we're not gonna deal with this emotional bullshit we've put each other through," She sneered, disgusted look swiping over her gentle features.

He nodded, "Fine, if that's really what you want. But I promise I'll figure something out."

"Yeah well I bet I'd be better off alone," She muttered, knowing very well that GLaDOS would kick in soon and try another one of her tricks to get Chell talking to her again.

There was silence for a few seconds as the elevator came to a stop at the next test chamber. Doug contemplated Chell's words for quite a long time before his eyes widened and it hit him.

_Alone._ All this time, that had been the answer. When Chell had defeated GLaDOS both times, they had been separated! Neither of them meeting each other until they had escaped... Together, they had the potential to be a strong team, but by working separately, they were able to combine their individual strengths and escape, unscathed. It had worked twice before, perhaps it could work again.

"Chell! I have an idea!" Doug reached out and held onto her wrist, pulling her to face him.

She shook free from him and turned, walking towards the chamber. Doug was about to yell again, but caught himself.

Suddenly the cool, malevolent voice spoke again, _"Oh look, it seems the lunatic has finally realized that Rats aren't very good companions... Perhaps I should test you two separately now? Seeing as the overweight lunatic can't seem to keep her fists from colliding with the Rat's filthy, very messed up head."_

Doug's eyes gleamed and he smiled, "YES! That's exactly what we want! God we hate each other now. I can't stand to look at her."

Chell whipped around to glare questioningly at him. Winking, he mouthed a quick "trust me" before turning back to look up at the ruby red eye that stared down at them, menacingly.

_"Or perhaps I could make you two fight to the death. Did you know that the female praying mantis eats the head of the male after coitus? It seems quite fitting in this situation."_

No. nononononononononono! Wrong! Doug regretted everything now. He had to act fast, lest they get thrown in some chamber and forced to fight to the death.

"Chell! Quick, you go into the chamber and wait for my signal," He demanded, already running back to to the elevator shaft.

Chell turned and gave him another questioning glare, but before she could see if he had saw and understood it, he was jumping down the empty shaft and out of sight. Her jaw dropped and only one thing ran through her mind: _He's nuts!_

* * *

><p><em><em>**Author's Note: ** Would you lookit that! Some serious drama llama is going down. I have no idea whats happening. Literally.


	18. Return of the Ratman

Troubled Minds

**Chapter 18: Return of the Ratman**

_"Oh look. The Rat's left you all alone. Abandoned you just like your parents. How terrible,"_ The voice mocked, a very obvious hint of joy in it as it hissed through the chamber. _"How does that make you feel? He used you, Chell. It seems you really are an unlikeable monster. Everyone you ever spent time with has abandoned you; Your parents, that moron in space... even the man you somehow seduced..."_

Chell stared down into the murky dark abyss that Doug had disappeared into just moments ago. For a moment, only a moment though, she seriously considered jumping down after him, or even calling down to him. But she didn't dare speak another word while GLaDOS was in hearing range. After her last slip of the tongue, Chell had made sure her lips were sealed tight. Chell stood up and turned to looked up at the camera, peering down at her ominously with its glowing red eye.

_"But did you know, 99.99999999% of humans who do science for the rest of eternity feel less utterly alone? Chell, we're friends. _I'll_ never abandon you. _Science_ will never abandon you..."_

Chell almost felt like laughing. The AI had sounded so desperate - no, she sounded jealous. It was almost as if GLaDOS was trying to convince Chell to like her. Chell shook her head slowly and began walking towards the entrance to the test chamber ahead. She had no idea where Doug had went, but she honestly couldn't care anymore, so many thoughts were rushing around in her head that Chell was too occupied with right now.

The fact that she was now facing these tests alone was a very common, reoccurring thought though. Sure, Chell had done a million tests alone before. In fact, all the tests she'd done before now she had been totally alone - or so she thought. But as the circular hatch hissed and slid open, and Chell's long fall boots _click clacked_ into the chamber, echoing throughout the large, open space, Chell couldn't help but miss the feeling of having someone close by.

Had she gotten used to being around people? Was that the cause for this strange feeling in her chest? Or was it just Doug that made her feel like this? Closing her eyes (a very desperate attempt to clear her mind of the millions of thoughts floating around), Chell took a quick, deep breath and, cracking her eyes open again, studied the test before her.

_"Oh dear, it seems this test requires a testing partner in order to be completed. It's too bad the Rat abandoned you. Oh well, let's just forget that ever happened. Perhaps you'd like some ice cream to cry over. Humans do that sort of thing don't they? Cry and complain and eat when they are depressed. But why don't I do the next best thing and lead you to the correct testing track?"_

Chell almost growled. These petty stabs at her emotions were making her angrier and angrier by the second. Clenching her teeth, Chell watched as the panels to her right jerked and opened to a small, dark passageway. She blinked, waited for the panels to settle, and took off into the passage, fearlessly.

~x~

Doug panted, bent over with his hand on the wall beside him, trying to catch his breath. He smiled, lifting his head to stare out the window down into the test chamber below. How he knew that she'd be on this testing track, he couldn't tell you. A hunch, that's what had lead him to believe Chell would be able to defeat GLaDOS and a hunch told him that GLaDOS would lead Chell straight to this testing track.

He knew this track like the back of his hand. This had been the testing track used to test the Advanced Knee Replacements when they had first been developed. The track was old and dusty, and of course the panels were rather defunct and many were broken, but there were TONS of his dens lying about. This would be an advantage. If he could catch Chell exploring one of the dens at just the right moment...

No! He couldn't let his thoughts distract him right now. There was work to be done. He took one last glance at Chell, reminded of when she first tested and he watched her for hours on end (how he had loved that), and turned, swiftly leaving the observation room and traversing the tiny labyrinth of hallways that connected to all the test chambers.

He headed down the hallway as fast as he could, then skidded to a stop at a small intersection. Peering around the corner, he saw them; the ghosts of his coworkers. He knew they weren't really there, but he could hear their voices creeping up on him slowly.

"Doug! Where ya headed to? Off to help that girl again?" Matt's voice called out, standing out from the rest.

"It's just your imagination, Doug. Stay calm," Doug muttered under his breath, avoiding eye contact.

"Why are you so bent on saving her life? You weren't so keen on saving ours!" Matt's voice boomed.

The voices of millions started to rumble, getting louder just as Matt's voice had died out. The voices were getting closer and Doug knew if he didn't act fast they'd envelop him in a thick blanket of guilt and he'd have another episode. He could remember the last time this happened; just after Wheatley had awoken Chell, the voices had caught him by surprise, swallowing him and leaving him screaming and wanting nothing more than to not be able to hear his own thoughts. He had thought he heard Chell on the other side of the panel he hid behind, a worried whimper escaping her lips as she listened to the blathering drabble that spilled from his mouth in incoherent streams.

Doug had to act fast, or he'd be a heap of blubbering schizophrenic mess for God knows how long. Speeding down another hall in the opposite direction, he didn't dare look back to see if the ghosts were chasing him. He could feel his heart pounding as the long fall boots he wore made loud clicking noises with each desperate leap away from the cacophony of haunting voices. Finally turning down another corner, he ripped the grating off a vent and jumped down into one of his little dens.

~x~

Chell had noticed that this testing track, while much older, had tons of Doug's dens. Chell also noticed, that if she disappeared into one, GLaDOS could, in fact, not see her. She must have forgotten to place hidden cameras in these dens...

Chell had just finished a very complicated flinging test when she came across a missing panel with a smeared black handprint next to it. None of the dens before had any indication of where they had been, she had just happened to stumble upon them as she was completing the tests. This one however was much different.

She peered inside to find it rather small, warm and empty. Her heart began to race as she took a few steps inside, it was much smaller than his other dens, but she could tell why he'd hide out here, there was another open panel on her right that lead right to a catwalk that went off into the foggy depths of Aperture. Perfect for staying concealed.

She strode over to the catwalk and squinted into the fog, trying her hardest to make out what was on the other side. She could barely make out the words "Head Office". Curiously, she took a step out onto the catwalk and gasped.

An hand shot out and wrapped itself around her mouth, her eyes widened and she tried to struggle only to realize an arm had wrapped itself around her waist. She felt hot breath against her neck and swallowed, fearful.

"It's me. Just... don't make her aware that we're here okay? Stay quiet," Doug's voice cooed into her ear. Chell immediately relaxed.

He let go of her and she turned to look at him, relief washing over them both. "You're... you're alright!" Chell whispered.

"Yeah, I'm fine. How are you?" He asked, kissing her forehead softly.

"I'm... I'm okay."

"Good. Listen, I'm gonna get us the hell out of here, but you have to listen to what I say and you can't pull a bitchy routine like you did the last time," Doug warned.

Chell was a little annoyed that he was being so bossy, but if he'd figured out way to get out of here then she'd listen. She nodded, showing she understood.

"Good, now, together, GLaDOS can play her mind games and make us hate each other, but separate, we can evade and defeat her again."

Chell realized this was true, and looked surprised. She hadn't realized it at the time, but now she could see why they had succeeded before. "What do we do then?"

"Simple, You're going to do the next two or three chambers, act like nothing is going to happen and wait for my signal."

"What's your sig-"

"You'll know it when you see it. As for me, I'm going to head down to the head office, I need to find something before we can escape," His voice was stern, and he avoided eye contact, opting to stare straight into the fog behind her.

"I'll go with you," She protested.

"No, if GLaDOS notices you've gone missing for too long she'll get suspicious. Go test, and wait for my signal!" He demanded, finally making eye contact.

"Fine, just... just don't get yourself killed," Chell warned.

"I won't, I promise," He whispered, hugging her tightly.

"Doug..." Chell began, but she was cut off as his lips smashed against hers quickly before he slipped past her and disappeared into the fog.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> OH LORDY! I am so sorry for not updating sooner! I have been extremely busy with art school and all this stuff. I also haven't been feeling very well as of late. Not sick, just... personal stuff. yeah. So chapter 19 will be up later tonight! Stay tuned folks! And thanks again for reading! Tell me what you think!


	19. King of Rats

Troubled Minds

**Chapter 19: King of Rats**

Doug's heart pounded heavily in his chest. His fists clenched and he felt warm blood trickling down his fingers and onto the floor as his nails dug into his skin. Each foot hit the floor with lightning speed until he skided to a stop in front of a large wooden door.

The door was old and cracked. The once shiny luster of the wood now dull and dusty, and the wood was slowly decaying in some places. This door has been locked for years. No one has dared to go into it since its owner disappeared. Above the rotting wooden frame, a dusty gold name plate was screwed tightly into the thin, grey drywall. The paint was peeling on the walls and as Doug reached up to swipe away the dust and dirt on the nameplate, he noticed the acrid smell that filled the air.

Cave Johnson - CEO. The nameplate said. Doug smiled and remembered the reason why the door was locked. After Johnson died, no one felt comfortable in his office. People would complain the smell of rotting flesh and the haunting sounds of Aperture's former CEO's disembodied voice hung in the air of the office. Of course, these had just been rumors, and Doug knew the putrid smell had been coming from the morgue (yes, Aperture had been equipped with a morgue in it's later days due to - ahem - _many_ on-the-job "accidents") only a few floors below and the disembodied voices of Johnson were actually just his prerecorded messages, but that didn't stop his coworkers from believing such bullshit rumors. Doug knew better, but had let them have their fun, locking and sealing his office forever, just the way he had left it.

Doug took one last look at the former CEO's decaying glory before he kicked the door down. He didn't need to use as much strength as he did, as the door would have easily crumbled under the lightest touch. Waving the dust that had shot up into the air in cloudy wisps of ashen coloured smoke out of his face, Doug coughed and squinted into the dimly lit room.

Everything was how it had been left; the desk (now covered in a thick layer of dust) was still in its spot in the middle of the room, the old wheeled office chair was now rather rusty from years of not being used, and the ceiling high bookshelves still stood against one wall behind the desk, their books now moth-eaten and yellowed. Doug marveled at the sight of it all. Taking a few more steps into the room, memories started flushing back; his second job interview, his countless proposal rejections, hell he even remembered Caroline once slipped him a note in this room asking him to lunch while Johnson squabbled on about something Doug couldn't remember now. He was too nervous to go to that lunch. Too worried it would be too much like an actual date. Doug didn't want that, Caroline was much older than he was, it just didn't seem right to him at the time.

He shook the thoughts from his mind as he realized he hadn't much time to dwell in the past. Setting right to work, ignoring the god awful stench arising from the vents, Doug started cracking open every drawer, cubby hole and cabinet in the entire room. Searching frantically, Doug seemed to be looking for something that had been lost decades ago...

~x~

Chell crouched, her back flat against a wall with a large painting of a cube with wings on it, panting with her head in her hands. Adrenal vapor did wonders for keeping a body working on little to no sleep, but that still did not mean that the human body didn't _need_ sleep. No, all adrenal vapor did was make your body a little more awake, your mind on the other hand...

Chell yawned, stretching her arms out in front of her. The power nap didn't do much to stop her fatigue from setting in, but she was rested enough to keep going. She stood up, brushed herself off and walked back into the test chamber. She felt another yawn escape and she stretched her arms above her head again.

_"You were hiding for quite a lot longer than you usually do. You weren't reproducing with the rat again were you?"_ GLaDOS teased.

Chell was unresponsive as usual. Doug had said she'd only have to do two or three more chambers before he'd create his distraction and get them out of there. Seven test chambers later Chell was still waiting. What was taking him so long?

Shooting a blue portal and hoping through her orange portal, Chell continued on through to the next part of the test chamber, solving them with an almost incredible speed. Each test was slightly more difficult than the last, but Chell was starting to get rather used to it again. She hopped through another set of portals, placed a few cubes on buttons and finally found herself at the end of the test.

_"Good work, Lunatic. Only 31.4 billion tests left. Good luck," _The voice haunted her. Chell could almost hear the smile in that voice... if only GLaDOS had a mouth to smile with.

~x~

He found what he was looking for the moment he had broken into the locked compartments of Johnson's desk. Inside the standard sized drawer lay a bulky old floppy disc from the 1970's. There was a thick layer of dust on it, just like the rest of the room, but the only difference between the floppy disc and the rest of the room was that it was more important than anything in the room.

The label was starting to peel off, and Doug noticed it was slightly deformed on one side (it was possible it had survived many things, especially since it was in Aperture), butthe damage was nothing fatal to the precious information on this disc. He reached into the drawer and gently picked it up, swiping the dust off of it and turning it in his hands, staring at it as if he had found the last crystal skull. He read the label over and over again, the smile on his face growing wider and wider as he did.

"_GLaDoS Encoder script v.01"_

And scrawled beneath that, in messier, more frantic writing:

"_Do not use - facility killer"_

The plan was set. All Doug needed to do was find Chell and make their escape. But there was a problem...

As Doug left the office, he noticed a door in the hallway similar to Johnson's only smaller and less important looking. Another gold name plate hung above the door, this one was smaller and easier to read: "Assistant Caroline ..." The last name had been worn and scratched away. Doug's eyes shut as a shaky breath escaped his lips. He stopped in front of the door and sighed.

He couldn't just leave her behind. The memory of her at least. She had been much older than him when they met, but she had been his one and only friend. He couldn't just... leave that.

Doug's hand shot out and landed on the door softly. He felt the rotting wood and chipping paint under his fingers. He felt like the whole world was dying and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He pushed gently and the door swung open with a loud creak. Unlike the former office, after Caroline's untimely demise instead of closing off and sealing shut her office like they had done to Johnson's, they decided to abandon the entire wing, in hopes that GLaDOS would take over the roles that Caroline and Johnson once had.

Caroline's office was smaller and consisted simply of a desk, two chairs, a book shelf and a potted plant, long dead from neglect. There were still piles upon piles of paperwork that once needed to be done but now just sat in slowly decaying mounds, waiting for a day when they might be useful again. Doug felt his heart beat faster and his pulse quicken, just like it had the day of his first job interview here as he stepped inside.

Instant memories of all the discussions they had, all the arguments, all the friendship they shared came flooding back and he fell to his knees. Doug had no idea why he was doing this, or what he was doing here in the first place, but he knew it wouldn't feel right if he didn't come here.

"Caroline. If you're listening, wherever you are. Whether it been in heaven, which after quite a long time here I have doubt it even exists, let alone God himself. Or whether you are actually stuck in that monster we unleashed upon this facility. I just... I wanted to say that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for the pain and suffering you had to endure, the torture it must have been to go through a procedure as deadly as that. But most of all, most of all... I'm sorry I was never there... to help you. To save you. To stop them. I'm such a coward and yet here I am, alive and well. I feel so guilty, I'm to blame for all this. If it wasn't for me you'd have been able to live a-"

_Shhhh I'll have none of this nonsense._

Doug lifted his head and glanced around the room looking for the origin of the strange familiar voice.

_You've always been to hard on yourself Doug. You've never sat back and looked at things calmly. _

He knew that voice. He _knew_ that voice... it was so...

_Yes Doug, it's me, Caroline. But my voice does sound very familiar doesn't it? Like a certain cube, perhaps?_

"Cici!" Doug exclaimed, giving up on looking for the owner of the disembodied voice and instead grinning like an excited child.

_You imagined Cici's voice to sound like mine because you felt guilty for being the only one to survive and I had been your only friend before the GLaDOS construct. You modelled your conscience after me because I was the only pure thing in your mind besides Chell._

Doug said nothing. She told nothing but the truth, he had formed his conscience to sound and act like Caroline would have if she had still been alive. Of course, there were some differences. It was his conscience after all, so it shared his thoughts more than Caroline would have, but the overall idea was that the cube represented his choices and desires to change the past.

_You're not at fault here, Doug. I made the conscious choice to proceed with the GLaDOS project. It was my decision, not yours._

"Why did you do it? Why didn't you just call it all off?" Doug asked.

_The truth is Doug... Although I love science very much, I wouldn't have done what I did for just anyone..._

"You mean..."

_Yes Doug. I will admit, I was in love with Mr. Johnson and I couldn't do anything about it. It killed me to watch him die slowly. I know it may sound... well a bit cliche in my opinion, but I couldn't bare to live without him._

"So... you wanted to die?" Doug was starting to believe this was just another one of his episodes.

_I didn't want to die. I wanted to forget. The GLaDOS project made it seem like all I'd remember was science. Science, science, science. I'd never have a human memory again. But that didn't work out as planned either, haha!_ Her laugh was sickly sweet, just as he had remembered it to be.

Doug stared at the desk, a file lay on it with the words [FILE REDACTED] stamped across in large red letters. Her laughter was sweet and genuine, just like it had been when she was living. Her disembodied voice sounded so real that Doug could imagine the wrinkles forming around her eyes as she laughed.

_Doug, you need to stop dwelling in the past and move on. You have Chell to worry about now. Don't make the same mistakes you did with me._

Doug's head shot up to look questioningly at the invisible voice. His eyes wide with wonder and curiosity. He opened his mouth to speak but a terrible pain in his head stopped him. He groaned and clutched his head in his hands, falling to his knees.

A couple of drown out screams later, Doug fell to the floor, a constant ringing in his ears as the voices of his past came flooding into the room. He looked up, his mouth suddenly dry and he felt constricted, like a thousand leather belts had wrapped around him and were tightening themselves slowly. Another episode, of course. He knew what he had to do, he had to leave this room, get as far away as possible. But it was already too late.

_Wake up Doug. Don't forget what you came here to do..._

~x~

Chell was starting to think Doug wasn't coming. Perhaps he had left without her? Or worse, he'd died. Chell did not want to think about that possibility and shot another portal, wiping the thought away with the intense kickback from the device. As she stepped through it and entered the new part of the test chamber, she could hear the distant whining and groaning of the facility, it's various machines and mechanisms working hard to keep science (or GLaDOS' twisted image of science) going.

She was just about to solve the puzzle - it was a rather complicated one involving lightbridges and massive amounts of turrets - when she noticed another black handprint indicating another rat den. Chell took one look at the red eye following her every movement and slipped inside. A smirk formed on her lips as she heard GLaDOS's voice, annoyed, asking her to come back and finish the test.

Chell's sly smirk quickly faded though as she realized quickly that this den was indeed not the signal she was hoping for. Instead of finding Doug waiting for her, the room was empty. Not a trace of anyone there. There wasn't even any paintings on the walls. That was odd...

"Hello? Is anybody there?" A tinny mechanical voice called out.

Chell froze, her blood turning ice cold as sh listened to the turret's call.

"The Ghosts of the past cannot be saved," The turret squeaked.

Chell relaxed, sighing with relief and turning to face the little oracle turret. She wondered how it had gotten here; the last time she had seen it was in the turret redemption lines during her escape with Wheatley.

"The rat will propose an offer to the queen which she cannot refuse," It continued.

Chell knelt beside the little turret and listened carefully, just like she had the first time they met.

"The angel will birth a child who will become a God and do many great things. The shooting star will start a revolution. The depths of hell will freeze and the queen's prisoners will be free. The shooting star will also make a deal the queen can't refuse. Maybe, someday. Maybe, someday. Maybe, someday," The turret chanted. The sound was creepy, and Chell had no idea what it was talking about. She listened anyways, hoping to hear something useful.

"Maybe, someday. The rat will become a hero. But all heros perish," It finished, immediately shutting down afterwards.

"Wait, what?" Chell panicked, she grabbed the turret and frantically began looking for a way to power it on again, turning it over and over in her hands. She shook it, a desperate growl escaping her, "Just tell me what that's supposed to mean!"

She gave up, angrily tossing the turret aside and curling up into a ball on the floor. She closed her eyes, hoping that when she opened them again she wouldn't feel so helpless and alone.

~x~

Doug gasped and shot up, sitting on the dusty floor of Caroline's office. He ran a shaky, boney hand through his messy dark hair and along his stubbly chin, eyes frantically jotting around the room as if looking for a hidden enemy.

He hardly remembered what had just happened. All he could remember were fragments of the conversation with the Caroline in his mind. She had done it for love, not science, she had done it to forget everything. GLaDOS was reliving Caroline's memories over and over for all of eternity...

Doug had to act fast, already it had been too long. He had to find Chell and escape fast. His plan was in motion now and there was no stopping it now. He stood up, brushed the dirt and dust off him and shot out into the hallway, running straight back to his little network of tunnels and dens.

He ran as fast as his tired, wounded legs would carry him. His heart pounded in his chest as he skidded around another corner, checking each and every test chamber until finally he found her in the den with the oracle turret.

She was sleeping, or at least, it looked as though she was sleeping. Doug could see she had been crying, her face shiny and wet with tears. He stood by an open panel and watched her, a tiny smile on his lips. The next chamber, he thought, the next chamber he will give the signal. He turned and left the den, but not before pulling out a permanent marker and scrawling a quick message on the wall for her:

"You've got sucker's luck,

have you given up?

Does it feel like a trial?"

~x~

Chell sat up and rubbed her eyes with the heel of her palm. She hadn't really slept, rather, she had been stuck between conscious and unconscious, her thoughts whirling around in her head and causing her to wake up more tired than she had been when she fell asleep. She glanced up and her eyes widened as she read the message on the wall. A wide smile appeared on her face and she instantly shot up and back into the test chamber.

~x~

Chell felt the elevator shake unsteadily as it descended to the next chamber, her heart beating faster. She made a mental note to never use an elevator ever again, the thought of them breaking and falling scared her, as hard as that was to admit.

She stepped into the chamber and glanced around, quickly figuring out what she had to do to solve it. Shooting a blue portal onto one panel, and the orange one onto another, she made a light bridge appear across a large gap that stood in her way of the exit.

She had taken three or four steps across the bridge when she heard GLaDOS scream, _"This CAN'T BE HAPPENING!"_

The announcer voice, the cheerful creepy male voice that had greeted chell when Wheatley had first woken her up chimed in, **"Evacuation procedure has been activated. All employees and test subjects must calmly and quickly make their way to an emergency exit. Thank you, and hope to God you don't die on the way out."**

A loud screeching noise pierced the air and Chell dropped the portal gun to cover her ears. She watched as every panel in the chamber flipped upwards, revealing a pathway on the outskirts of the testing track. Chell beamed as she saw Doug off in the distance, waving at her hastily to get moving and follow him. She scooped up her portal device and ran towards him.

"We need to get out of here fast!" He exclaimed over the loud screeching of the panels and metal moving around.

"Why?" Chell shouted over the noise.

"Don't question it just follow me and do NOT look back at the testing track."

She couldn't argue with him because just as she opened her mouth the announcer chimed in again, **"Testing block # 22299 sector B will self destruct in 10 minutes."**

"Oh... shit!" Chell muttered as they started running.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> hey hey! So here it is! The second to last chapter! We're almost done! Are you as excited as I am?


	20. Paradise

Troubled Minds

**Chapter 20: Paradise**

Chell was out of breath and Doug was half dead by the time they stopped running. Doug collapsed in a heap on the worn out tiled floor of the corridor they found themselves in, panting as he tried to slow his heart rate. Chell leaned against the wall, her head pounding with the rush of adrenaline that flowed through her. She glanced down at Doug and smiled, "We did it!"

It took Doug a few minutes to regain his composure before he replied with his own flash of a grin, "Not quite, we still have to get the hell out of here."

Chell nodded and waited for him to get going. He struggled to get up off the ground, his wounded leg did not seem to be getting any better, and he looked a lot older now in the dim lighting of the facility.

"Where are we?" Chell asked in a whisper, helping him up gently.

"The corridor leading to Her chamber..."

Chell's eyes widened and her heart stopped. She suddenly recognized the decaying walls and overgrowth she had encountered before her last meeting with the A.I.

"We're going to... We have to go into Her Chamber," Doug continued, pausing between words to regain strength.

"We can't! She'll kill us both!"

"She won't. We're too valuable to Her."

"She's tried to kill me more than once. And you too! I'm surprised She hasn't filled the entire facility with neurotoxin yet!" Chell argued, her heart was starting to beat faster again. She did NOT want to meet face to face with GLaDOS again. Twice she had been lucky enough to survive, but there was no chance she could survive again.

"She's too busy dealing with that disaster I caused in that testing track to worry about us. I have a plan though," He flashed the old floppy disk, "This is a virus developed by Cave Johnson's top programmers when he started the whole GLaDOS project. This virus can wipe GLaDOS out and the rest of the facility in a matter of mere seconds."

Chell gave Doug a confused look, she wasn't very good with technological computer speak, but she knew what a virus was. She was just about to ask why they just hadn't used the virus to stop her on Bring Your Daughter To Work Day when he cut her off.

"It was developed and tested, but forgotten when Johnson's office was locked up. No one remembered that it existed except for myself and a few others. But by the time I reached Johnson's office during Bring Your Daughter to Work Day most of the employees were already dead. I couldn't save them. It was all my fault," He explained.

Doug curled in on himself and clutched at his temples, suddenly reliving the nightmare again. Chell knelt beside him and wrapped her arms around him tightly. A real hug, a comforting, caring hug. Unlike the one she had given him when Cici had "died".

"It's not your fault," She whispered, "If anything you tried your hardest. You did what you thought was best, and I owe you my life."

He looked up at her, eyes glossy and still strikingly odd. A hint of a smile flashed before her eyes and he stood up slowly. "Let's go. She'll be expecting us..."

Chell slipped her hand into Doug's and smiled, "Ready?"

Doug planted a tiny kiss on her forehead and said nothing as they began to walk towards the airlock door.

~x~

_"I wondered when you two would find me. It is so nice to see you again,"_ The Massive A.I. commented, sarcasm practically dripping from Her words. The intimidating size of the machinery threatened to crash to the ground, as if hanging by one single thread to the ceiling, as the A.I. spun around to face them. _"It was bad enough you tried to kill me twice, but now you've gone and blown up part of my facility too! Now I remember why I told you to never come back..."_

Chell was trembling. She had never felt so terrified in her life. She kept her facial features calm and neutral though, knowing very well her lack of reaction would piss GLaDOS off even more. It seemed to work too, as She coiled back up into the ceiling like a spider would hide in a corner of its web. The optic flared and a loud growl erupted from the machine.

Doug stood tall. Now was his chance to prove he wasn't a coward. A deep set frown carved into his features and he stared, fire ablaze in his eyes, at the machine that had cause Caroline's demise so many years ago. "Caroline... Let us go."

_That_ was his plan? Chell almost broke character as he said it, knowing fully that GLaDOS would just laugh it off and try to kill them again.

_"Caroline has been deleted. She doesn't exist anymore, Rat."_

"No, she does. Her files were encrypted and blocked so that, in case you did become self aware of them and delete them, they could easily return... I know you're in there Caroline. Show yourself."

Chell watched in horror as GLaDOS began screaming and thrashing about in her chassis, _"NO! Nononono! YOU'RE LYING! You're a rat you know? Rats are disgusting creatures that carry disease and death! YOU AREN'T LIKED BY ANYONE! EVEN THE MUTE LUNATIC HATES YOU!"_

Chell knew this routine; she had witnessed (and had fallen victim to) it twice before. GLaDOS was so enraged that she resorted to petty remarks and insults to try and redeem herself. It was pathetic for a supercomputer with the ability and access to all the knowledge known to mankind, but Chell knew it was only going to get worse.

_"You were never loved, either of you! You're perfect for each other! A filthy, dirty, disease ridden Rat and his murderous mute pawn. You're using each other. You don't actually care for each other you just want what you obviously can't have! And that's the love of others!"_

Doug stayed perfectly still, his strange eyes fixated on the large A.I. Chell gave in and glanced worriedly at him, she did not like where this was going at all. GLaDOS suddenly stopped thrashing around and curled back into the ceiling, catching Chell's attention again.

**"File Caroline not found!"** The cheery voice of the announcer sounded.

_"See Rat? She's dead. I wiped her from existence when Chell left," _GLaDOS' voice had changed in tone. In was now an octave lower, and sounded... seductive in a way. Chell remembered this version of Her voice the first time she had "killed" the supercomputer. She had started talking with it right after the morality core had been incinerated.

Chell started to step back towards the door, she knew it was of no used but the desperate survivor in her told her to flee. Doug glanced quickly over his shoulder at her. Funny, he remembered being in Chell's spot only (what felt like) hours ago. He ignored her and turned back to GLaDOS, smiling devilishly.

"Try CaroDOS2265," He said calmly.

**"File CaroDOS2265 found! Contains . Cannot be deleted!"**

_"WHAT? This isn't possible! I don't remember this file even being here! How did you...? Grrrrrr I HATE YOU!"_ GLaDOS' optic widened and she moved in dangerously close to the former scientist in attempt to frighten him.

"It's fire-walled and encrypted like I said. It was scripted that way so you'd never find it until given the actual file name." The answer was so calm, his face was so serious, Chell thought he would snap at any moment.

Chell was backed up against the wall now, portal gun abandoned on the ground and body shaking so violently she couldn't see much that wasn't a blur. How did the tables turn? She would never have been so terrified of GLaDOS before. Doug had changed something in her and she couldn't tell if it was for the better or for worse.

Suddenly a blood curdling scream erupted from GLaDOS as She fought against the oppositional power of Caroline inside Her mainframe. Chell froze and stared wide-eyed and frightened beyond belief as the A.I. fell forward and swung softly, as if She had died, finally.

Silence filled the air, so thick Chell felt like she couldn't breathe. She was about to push herself away from the wall and inch closer to Doug when his hand shot out and motioned for her to wait there. Not knowing what else to do, Chell returned to her cowardly position against the wall.

**"File CaroDOS2265 corrupted. File corrupted. System reboot in 3...2... BZZZZZZT"**

GLaDOS' dangling head shot back up and the bright yellow of her optic glared at them, blinding them both for a moment before turning away. _"Hello, Doug."_

"Hello Caroline," Doug greeted, a hint of excitement in his voice.

_"It's nice to see you again, but I really can't stay long. You know that right?"_

"I do. I just need to ask one thing of you."

_"Anything for my dearest friend!"_

"I need you to do something for me. I need you to make sure GLaDOS sets us free. Can you do that?"

_"Of course I can Doug."_

"Thank you Caroline."

_"Goodbye Doug."_

"Goodbye... Caroline..."

Chell looked away as Doug placed his hand gently on the A.I's optical plate. The scene seemed too intimate for her. A final goodbye between close friends. It pained Chell to watch it. She did not belong in the scene and felt she was intruding on their forgotten romance.

A moment later though, GLaDOS had returned. _"You think she'll be able to stop me from killing you but that's where you'd be wrong. Remember deadly Neurotoxin? It killed all of your co-workers and you had no time to save them."_

Doug was silent. Chell was (obviously) silent as well as GLaDOS, in an expressive gesture the two humans could only comprehend to be the A.I's version of a malevolent smirk, recoiled slightly in her chassis. The expression, smug and definitely evil, was almost too human for her.

_"You've gone mute. You must have gotten it from the murderous lunatic. But that's just fine. It will give me some time to warm up the Neurotoxin just for you..."_

"You won't do it," Doug stated. His voice was flat and stern, nothing like his usual accent.

Chell noticed that a few panels were missing in the roof, she assumed they were the panels that had gone missing in space during her last visit. The evening sunlight trickled through, casting a soft, warm glow onto the machinery and wires that made up GLaDOS' body. Chell smiled deviously as she saw the flaw in GLaDOS' plan.

GLaDOS noticed the quiet woman's smirk and instantly snapped at her, _"What do you think you're smiling at? Neurotoxin online!"_

Doug simply pointed to the openings in the roof as the green gas flooded the room and rose. He covered his nose and mouth for a moment with his sleeve and waited for the A.I. to realize her flaws. Chell, arms bare from sleeves, took a quick deep breath and held it, praying that she wouldn't have to hold it for long.

GLaDOS followed Doug's gaze to the holes in her ceiling, optic desperately glancing from hole to hole to hole in search of one that wasn't gaping and letting light pour into her facility.

_"I forgot about those little reminders of the moron..." _She spoke softly. _"Neurotoxin doesn't work well when it can escape..."_

Doug smiled as the noxious green gas slowly started to disperse, escaping through the gaping holes in the roof and leaving behind only the faint scent of poisonous air. He could tell GLaDOS had shut it off after a minute or two when the air smelt fresh again. Or as fresh as machinery and antiseptic sterilized laboratories could get.

_"Alright, fine. I can't kill you with neurotoxin. Perhaps I shall give you a chance. What are your demands, Rat?" _The hint of defeat in Her voice made Chell smile again.

Doug felt a hand on his shoulder and glanced down to see Chell smiling up at GLaDOS. He was distracted for a moment by her sheer beauty, but quickly regained his composure and pulled the floppy disk out. "This, is a virus."

_"I KNOW what a virus is, Rat, they have no affect on me. I have anti-virus systems installed..."_

"This isn't just any old virus... oh no. This virus was commissioned by Cave Johnson himself to shut the GLaDOS machine down in the event of... well just in case it decided to become corrupted..."

The optic widened and Doug continued, smirk spreading across his rather scruffy face, "That red telephone you destroyed during Bring Your Daughter To Work Day? That was a modernized version of this virus... This virus won't just shut you down... it'll shut down the entire facility..."

_"You wouldn't!"_

"I would. And I will if you don't let us go free."

_"YOU MONSTER!"_

A gasp filled Doug's ears and he glanced down to see Chell pointing to something on the other side of the chamber. A line of Turrets had appeared and we're all aimed at them. Deja vu set in as Doug froze, stiffened muscles screaming in pain as he gazed at the death trap awaiting them.

"_Something wrong?" _GLaDOS' voice returned to it's normal sarcastic tone. _"I'll let you live... I'll even let you go free. But here's the catch... I will only let one of you go."_

Fear. That's how Chell would describe the terrible gut feeling in her stomach as she realized what might happen. Pure unforgiving fear. But before she could even react Doug had already stepped away, closer to the center of the chamber and towards the turrets who, coincidentally, blocked the path to the main network system where the virus could be installed.

An intense silence filled the air as Doug inched closer and closer to the shiny death traps. It seemed like with each step he took three hours past, but all of a sudden a tiny little voice spoke up, "Target acquired!"

Gunshots echoed through the vast chamber and Chell's eyes widened in horror as she watched, in what felt like slow motion, as Doug's body was punctured with tiny little holes.

"Deactivated," The turrets chimed in unison, their red little optics fading to black as Doug's body hit the floor with a deafening thud.

"DOUG, NO!" Chell screeched, forgetting her rule to stay quiet around artificial intellegences, and ran to kneel by his side.

She sighed in relief to see he was still breathing, although barely. She crouched down and wrapped her arms around his bleeding body, the corners of her eyes starting to water. "Don't die," She whispered, "Please stay alive!"

"I'm fine, really," He coughed, his voice weaker and more desperate.

GLaDOS stared down at them, her optic glowing brightly, casting an ominous glow onto the two humans. _"I guess we know who is going and who is staying now..."_

"You bitch!" Chell screeched, clutching Doug's body close to her. Doug coughed, blood spurting from his mouth and onto his sweater - the one Chell had found for him.

"Shhh Chell..." He spoke, but the words came out gurgled. He lifted the floppy disk with the virus on it and placed it gently in Chell's hands. She glanced down at it; it was cracked and falling apart, a bullet had shot through it, it was useless now. Doug then turned his attention to GLaDOS.

"I'm... I want to make a deal with you," He panted, blood trickling down his chin.

_"I'm listening..."_

"Let Chell go free... and... I'll stay. I'll... I'll test for you... For all eternity," His words were slowly becoming quieter and quieter.

"Doug no! You're in no shape to test! We need to get you to a doctor!" Chell began, frantically wiping the blood from his face. An attempt to pretend he wasn't dying.

_"You're dying Rat! You are of no use to me."_

"But you can fix me."

There was a silence that filled the air so thickly Chell couldn't even tell she was breathing anymore. Doug didn't dare look anywhere but at GLaDOS, no matter how many times Chell tried to turn his head to look at her.

_"You're right. I can fix you. The question is, do I want to?"_

"I'll never leave. You have my word. I'll test until I'm of no use anymore. Then you can kill me."

Chell abruptly began sobbing, burying her face into the blood soaked cloth of his sweater and mumbling something that sounded along the lines of "Please don't do this. I love you!"

Doug smiled, weakly of course, and wrapped his arms around her, whispering softly into her ear the exact same words she had uttered to him the night she found him, "Does it trouble your mind the way you trouble mine?"

_"I have one condition though..." _GLaDOS interrupted, as if she knew they were having their little moment._ "If I am to let the monstrous woman free, she must never ever, EVER, speak of or tell anyone of this place."_

"Fine, done!" Doug exclaimed, coughing again and wincing in pain as he returned his attention to the A.I. Too much blood was escaping the tiny bullet holes now, his skin was paler than ever before. Chell was drenched in his blood and she couldn't help but cry as she watch him slowly die in her arms.

_"It's settled then,"_ GLaDOS chimed as one massive metal claw appeared and snatched Doug out of Chell's arms. Chell screamed watching as the claw gently placed the man in a relaxation pod, like the one she had woken up in many, many years ago.

"Please!" Chell pleaded, "At least let me visit him sometimes!" Her arms were outstretched and she looked like a child begging for its mother.

GLaDOS watched as the relaxation pod closed with a loud vacuum seal sound and disappeared slowly into some chamber below. The massive machine seemed to consider the woman's request, and if there was an inner battle between her and Caroline going on, GLaDOS didn't seem to show it.

After the pod had disappeared and a long period of time consisting only of the sound of Chell's quiet sobs and the ever distant hum of machinery, GLaDOS turned back to Chell, her optic blaring down on the young woman.

_"I will allow you to visit him and my facility on two conditions,"_ The smooth voice of the robotic queen had a hint of sympathy in it. _"One of those conditions is the one from before, about never speaking of this place again to anyone. And I mean it."_

Chell glanced up, using her bloodied arms to shield her eyes from the brightness of GLaDOS' optic. Inside, Chell couldn't help but hear the song, Doug's song, over and over in her head. It was all she could think of.

_"The second condition, is that when you are finished visiting you mustn't take anything that is property of Aperture. No equipment, no supplies, and especially no androids or test subjects..."_

Chell's rebellious, tenacious side wanted nothing more than to say "fuck you" and let herself get killed right then and there, but if she ever wanted to see Doug again she'd have to comply. Staring down at the pool of blood on the floor, Chell nodded slowly and whispered, "I agree."

With that, GLaDOS seemed satisfied. The next thing Chell knew, she was being lifted into the air by another massive claw and being flung into another large elevator. She felt something hit her shoulder and looked down to see her back pack, the one she had taken with her when they had come here, was lying next to her. She reached out and clutched it close to her. The elevator doors swiftly shutting and with a quick rumble, it began to rise.

This time, there was no turret opera to bid her farewell. There was no overwhelming joy that she was alive and that she would finally see the light of day again. Chell buried her face into the backpack and waited for the elevator to come to a complete stop. Nothing was pleasant about this farewell. Chell felt terrible.

~x~

Thick, white snow covered the ground as Chell was thrown out of the elevator and the tiny little shed in the wheat fields. The bitter cold instantly made her shiver, the liquid blood that covered most of her arms and legs had begun to coagulate and freeze. It was nearly a 5 hour walk back to the city, but being as determined as ever, Chell began the long trench.

An hour or so into it though, she gave up, letting herself fall into a snowbank. Weakly, she reached for her backpack and dug around inside of it, pulling out matches and a road flare. Lighting the flare, she used all the strength she had left to hold it up and wave it back and forth slightly. It was getting dark and she knew Michelle or whoever was on watch would be able to see it.

~x~

Chell woke up in the back of an armored vehicle. The ones they used to collect supplies and survivors. She was surprised to see Michelle leaning over her, washing her face with a warm, damp cloth and cooing softly to her.

"Shhh Chell, it's gonna be alright. We're gonna get you some help. Everything is gonna be alright!" Michelle's voice was motherly... just like Chell had remembered it.

"Where the fuck has she been? How did she get so much blood on her?" Some one asked.

"We thought she was dead! She's been gone for 6 fucking weeks! Thank god she's alright!" Another said.

Michelle smiled and answered Chell's unasked question, "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." Chell smiled softly, sadly, and with the rocking motion of the transport vehicle, she fell back asleep. She was home. She was in paradise.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Well. Here it is. The End. 3


	21. EPILOGUE

Troubled Minds

**Epilogue:**

Michelle breathed in the cold winter air and leaned on the railing of Chell's rarely used balcony. Chell sat on the small lawn chair Michelle had brought up with her. It was New Year's Eve and Michelle had come over with a bottle of sparkling wine and some canned fruit to celebrate. The two women were sitting on the balcony and waiting for the fireworks display that the city put on every year.

"I love this time of year, don't you?" Michelle asked, sipping her glass of wine and smiling at Chell.

Chell smiled and nodded, although she didn't like parties most of the time, New Years was a time for celebration and new beginnings. And what better than to start the new year off with a gift she knew was coming.

"I'm so sorry, Chell."

"What? Michelle? What do you mean you're sorry?"

"I hate seeing you like this!" The blonde confessed.

"What? I'm fine! Really! I'm happy!" Chell tried to explain.

"Something's bothering you! I can tell!" Michelle smiles deviously. She could always tell when something was wrong.

Just then, before Chell could open her mouth to explain, a meteor shower started, filling the night sky with hundreds and hundreds of "shooting stars". The two women focused all their attention of the beautiful wisps of light that flashed across the night sky. A rainbow of colours ranging from pinks to blues to violets and greens made the night sky light up brighter than any firework could.

"It's beautiful!" Chell exclaimed, having never seen a meteor shower before.

Michelle, who was usually very talkative, was at a loss for words.

Suddenly a blue one shot across the sky, the blue was so deep and vibrant that Chell had to look away for fear of being blinded. She had never seen anything more wonderful in her life.

Michelle smiled as the shower began to die down, and with a flick oh her hand ushered Chell inside. "Come on. Its getting colder, we should grab a blanket or something before the fireworks start."

Chell's hands instantly clutched at the bump on her stomach, it was barely noticeable, but every time she saw it, she smiled down at it with a shimmer in her eyes.

Chell remembered what she was about to tell her friend before the meteor shower, but she thought she would save it for another time. As Chell entered her old, run-down apartment, she said nothing, but only thought of Doug, and hoped he was thinking of her.

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><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> This chapter is completely optional. But here you are! Thanks for sticking with it to the end.3


	22. OST  Soundtrack BONUS

**Author's Note:** So as a little bonus I decided to add the soundtrack to this fic. Basically it's just a bunch of songs I felt went well with the story. I hope you enjoy them and the story! Thanks again to my readers! This was a great experience (even if I complained a lot!) and I hope to start the sequel soon after my next project!

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter 1: <strong>

Every day is exactly the same by Nine Inch Nails

High and Dry by Radiohead

Waiting For You by Akira Yamaoka and Mary Elizabeth McGlynn

**Chapter 2:**

Rabbit Heart (Raise it up) by Florence + The Machine

**Chapter 3:**

Exile Vilify by The National

**Chapter 4: **

Neon Bible by Arcade Fire

Ghost of Rattmann - Portal 2 Soundtrack

**Chapter 5: **

Homesick by The Cure

**Chapter 6:**

Exile Vilify by The National (this is obviously a reoccurring theme throughout the story as you all should know)

A Forest by The Cure

**Chapter 7:**

Paranoid Android by Radiohead

Close to me [Closet Remix] by The Cure (yes there's gonna be shittons of The Cure on this list, I listen to them while I write)

The perfect Girl by The Cure

**Chapter 8:**

Talking Bird (demo) by Death Cab for Cutie

Transatlanticism by Death Cab for Cutie

You've got the Love by Florence + The Machine

**Chapter 9:**

Rolling in the Deep by Adele

Neighbourhood #1 (Tunnels) by Arcade Fire

Blue Valentines by Tom Waits

**Chapter 10: **

Fake Frowns by Death Cab for Cutie

**Chapter 11:**

The End of the World by The Cure

**Chapter 12:**

Monster Hospital [MSTRKRFT remix] by Metric

**Chapter 13: **

You are a tourist by Death Cab for Cutie

There is a Light That Never Goes Out by The Smiths

Exile Vilify by The National

Fascination Street by The Cure (Fun fact: This song is literally about getting/giving a blowjob)

**Chapter 14:**

There is a Light that Never Goes Out by The Smiths

Une Annee sans Lumiere by Arcade Fire

**Chapter 15:**

Die by Akira Yamaoka

The Chase (Madison's Action Sequence) by Normand Corbeil (heavy Rain Soundtrack)

**Chapter 16:**

Bombs for Throwing at You from the Portal 2 Soundtrack Volume 3

Love as a Construct from the Portal 2 Soundtrack Volume 2

Exile Vilify by The National

**Chapter 17:**

Sleazy Bed Track by The Bluetones

Fear of Dying by Jack Off Jill

**Chapter 18:**

Bloom by Radiohead

Mornin' Mr. Magpie by Radiohead

Lotus Flower by Radiohead

**Chapter 19:**

Old Flame by Arcade Fire

Rescue by Echo and The Bunnymen

Wheatley Science from the Portal 2 Soundtrack Volume 3

**Chapter 20:**

The Part Where He Kills You from the Portal 2 Soundtrack Volume 3

Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons

Redemption by Normand Corbeil (from the Heavy Rain soundtrack)

Paradise by Coldplay

**Epilogue:**

Exile Vilify by The National

Painful Memories by Normand Corbeil (from The Heavy Rain soundtrack)

Float On by Modest Mouse


End file.
